Nothing is what it seems
by gsyoung
Summary: HarryDraco. A story showing how love is akin to hate. However, the course of true love never runs smooth... Harry and Draco finally give in after fighting their feelings for too long. A change in events causes their feelings towards each other to alter.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Author's note:  
Just setting the scene really... :)

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"Harry! Are you listening to me?"

Harry looked up with a confused look on his face. He had spent the past few minutes such deep in thought, he had not been aware of anybody talking to him. Upon looking up, he could see it was Hermione who was trying to get his attention.

"Course I was," he insisted.

Hermione raised her left eyebrow and looked at him sardonically. She then shook her head, picked up the rather enormous book she had picked up from the library earlier and began to read. Harry could not help but feel slightly annoyed that she had disturbed him from his thoughts for no good reason, but said nothing. He leant back in the comfortable armchair he was sitting in and enjoyed the constant heat being emitted from the fireplace opposite him. Looking at the time, he was rather alarmed to see it was already 11 o'clock. He had spent the past 2 hours relaxing in the common room, in front of the fire, and he still had a staggering amount of homework to do. Cursing himself for losing track of the time, he leant out for his bag and pulled a thick Potions book out from within. Picking up his quill, he began to write.

An hour later, Hermione put her book down, stretched out her arms and legs and then announced that she was going to bed. Feeling his eyes droop, he felt slightly bitter that she had finished all of her homework and had time to sleep whilst he still had so much to do. However, he reminded himself that it was entirely his own fault and bid her goodnight. Once she had left the common room, he continued with his essay.

At 2am, he decided he could no longer keep his eyes open and put his quill down. Yawning, he put his book on the floor and told himself that he would go to bed in five minutes after gathering some energy together. He closed his eyes, his skin still tingling from the heat emerging from the fireplace. He could feel his mind drifting, but he had no energy to prevent it.

Suddenly, he could feel someone shaking him. His eyes flew open, his heart racing from the unexpected interruption. Ron was towering above him, looking at him questioningly.

"Whyyouupsoearly?" Harry asked.

"What?"

Harry blinked and composed himself before repeating his question. "Why are you up so early?"

"Early? It's 9 o'clock, Harry."

Harry jumped up, realising he must have fallen asleep in the early hours of the morning. He noticed his potions book, essay and quill had all been placed neatly on the table across the common room. Guessing it was probably one of the house elves, he shoved all three items in his bag realising that if he was going to be on time for Potions, he would not have time to have a shower. He rushed upstairs to change his clothes and re-emerged a few minutes later, his hair more of a mess than usual. Grabbing his bag, he rushed out of the common room, closely followed by Ron.

Harry rushed down the corridor, not wanting to give Snape a reason to give him detention. Knowing that the Potions professor would not be very impressed with his attempt to write an essay, Harry pushed the door open and entered the room, with Ron following him. He noted that Hermione was already seated at a table quite near the front. The two boys took a seat either side of her just as Snape swept into the room.

Without so much as glancing at the class, he began to bark instructions at the class.

"Today, you will be brewing the remedial potion for simple poisons, which you should have outlined in your essay that I set for homework. This task will be done in pairs."

Harry, Ron and Hermione did not move, hoping they would be permitted to work as a three. However, Snape fixated his gaze upon them and gave a smug look.

"I think not. Potter, work with Draco." With this, he turned around and walked off. Knowing there was no point in arguing, Harry picked up his bag and begrudgingly moved over to where Malfoy was sitting. Malfoy looked up at him spitefully and Harry instantly knew it was going to be a long lesson.

"Did you even brush your hair today, Potter?" Malfoy practically spat at him.

Harry rolled his eyes and simply replied, "Shut it, Malfoy".

Malfoy leant back on his chair in a pose that Harry thought completely summed up his arrogance. He had a malicious smirk playing across his lips and Harry knew that he was not going to follow the instruction he had just given him.

"Do you enjoy looking like a tramp, Potter?" he drawled, "Or is it just that you've been hanging around with the weasel for too long?"

"Do you enjoy being a stuck-up git", Harry retaliated, "Or are you too thick to realise that nobody likes you?"

Malfoy looked at him, raising his eyebrows mockingly. "Now, now, Potter. That's not very nice, is it?"

Harry could feel his temper beginning to rise. Not wanting to be expelled for punching Malfoy's lights out, he stood up and fetched the ingredients they needed to brew the potion, giving himself time to calm down. By the time he returned back to the desk, he felt much calmer and began to cut up the roots that needed to be put in the potion first. Malfoy merely sat there and lazily watched Harry work. Once Harry had finished cutting up the roots, he began to make the potion, trying to completely ignore the other boy. The two boys worked in silence and Harry began to stir the potion.

"You did three clockwise stirs!" Malfoy accused. "You're only supposed to do two."

"I did do two!"

"No, you didn't. You did three, Potter." Malfoy said the last four words extremely slowly, as if he was speaking to an incredibly stupid child.

Fighting the urge to hit him, Harry again denied it.

"Professor Snape!" Malfoy called. Snape swept over to where the two boys were sitting. "Potter has just completely ruined our potion. He stirred the potion clockwise three times."

Snape looked at Harry disdainfully. "Fifteen points from Gryffindor for not following the correct instructions. I will not tolerate carelessness in this class."

Harry was outraged at this injustice and jumped out of his seat. "What! I only stirred it twice!" He shouted.

"A further five points from Gryffindor. I suggest you sit down, Potter, before I am forced to extract even more points." Snape retorted, scathingly.

Harry sat down, fuming. Unable to decide who he hated the most out of Malfoy and Snape, he glared at the desk, not wanting to give Snape yet another excuse to take more points away from him. He sat in this position until Snape announced it was the end of lesson. He picked up his stuff, leaving his essay on the desk, and stormed out of the dungeon before anybody could speak to him.

Charms and Herbeology, the following lessons, passed in a blur. Harry found the amount of information he was expected to absorb completely ridiculous and was not encouraged by Hermione's hand being constantly in the air, reciting facts in response to the various questions being fired at them. By lunchtime, Harry's head was spinning and he was grateful that he had no more lessons that day. Knowing he would regret not spending the remainder of the day catching up on the huge amount of work he had, he made his way down to the quidditch pitch, clutching his precious firebolt.

Once he reached the pitch, he mounted his broom and kicked off the ground, feeling an immediate rush of adrenalin. He could gradually feel his anger and tension leave his body, replaced by feelings of freedom and happiness. As he felt the wind rush through his hair, all of his previous annoyances were forgotten.

After a few laps of the pitch, he looked down and saw that he had a spectator. He flew over to where the person was standing and saw that it was Ginny. His face breaking into a warm smile, he dismounted his broom and greeted her.

"Hello, Ginny."

"Hey Harry, you ok?" Ginny asked.

"Yeah. What are you doing out here?" Harry asked, still feeling happy from flying.

"Just fancied a walk and I saw you flying, so I thought I'd watch for a while." Her eyes bore into him, wearing a serious expression on her face.

Harry studied her face for a few moments. He could not help but notice how unhappy she looked. His grin faded and was replaced by a look of concern.

"What's the matter, Ginny?" He asked.

She waited a few moments before replying. "I just can't get over what happened between us. I mean, I know you broke up with me because you didn't want me to get hurt, but I'm willing to risk it. We were so good together. Surely it's worth it?" Her eyes were beginning to fill with tears.

Harry did not know what to say. Although he had told her he cared about her too much to risk her getting hurt, the truth was he had realised he could not love her in any other way but platonically once they had begun dating. Not wanting to hurt her, or destroy his friendship with Ron, he had told her he couldn't risk her getting hurt. However, this was not completely a lie. He did care about her a great deal, but more like a sister rather than a girlfriend.

"Look, Ginny. It's not that I don't care about you…because I really do, but the thing is, if Voldemort found out we were together, he would use you to get to me. I care about you too much to see you get hurt. Please believe me." He felt guilty, but reminded himself he was not actually lying, just twisting the truth slightly.

Ginny began to cry. "I love you, Harry."

Harry pulled her into a protective hug. "Please don't cry, Gin."

He continued to hold her until she had finished crying. She looked up at him, with red eyes, and pulled away from him. She wiped her eyes and stood up straight. She suddenly looked rather embarrassed.

"Sorry, Harry," she mumbled, looking away from him. She muttered something about needing to be somewhere and turned around and began to walk away. Harry watched her leave the pitch, suddenly aware that it was dark. Waiting until Ginny had left his sight, he also began to walk back to the castle. He felt terrible for what he had done to her but decided it was better he ended it now rather than later.

When he got back to the common room, he went straight up to the dormitory, not wanting to speak to anyone. He lay on his bed and eventually drifted off into an uneasy sleep, not hearing his roommates enter the room a few hours later. 


	2. Chapter 2

"It's ok, Harry. They know I'm innocent." Sirius replied, with a huge grin across his face.

"Are you sure? What about the dementors?" Harry asked, not wanting to get his hopes up.

"Seriously, it's sorted. Trust me." Sirius responded earnestly.

"But…how?"

"Dumbledore. He explained to them… uh, Harry, this means that…well, if you want…you can live with me after all. I mean, I know I offered before but obviously that didn't work out. And I mean, I know you never knew your father…and I would never dream of taking his place…but perhaps, well, you know…I was thinking maybe we could be like father and son?" He proposed, apprehensively.

Harry felt elated. After all those years of being unloved and disregarded, he was finally going to have someone to look after him. To care for him. He couldn't describe the happiness pounding through his chest.

"You awake, Harry?"

Harry's eyes flew open, his head beginning to pound furiously. Ron was standing beside his bed, his eyebrows slightly raised. Harry felt groggy, the dream still buzzing through his mind. It had been so real. He had seriously thought Sirius was still alive, had still wanted to be a big part of his life. The reality cut him like a knife. He thought his head was going to explode, but for once, the pain was not originating from his scar. He closed his eyes, the pain was unbearable.

"Harry? What's wrong?" Ron nervously asked.

Harry opened his eyes once more, and attempted to sit up but immediately received a stabbing pain in the back of his head for his trouble. He flopped back against his bed and struggled to focus his eyes, which were increasingly becoming blurry. He could vaguely make out Ron's anxious face and attempted to smile reassuringly. However, it must have looked more like a grimace because Ron did not seem comforted.

"I'll go and get madam Pomfrey…you look really pale." Ron said, as he began to move off his bed.

Harry said nothing as Ron left the dormitory but closed his eyes again and felt his mind begin to wander back to last night's events. He remembered Ginny's face as he told her he couldn't be with her and wondered how she was feeling today. He couldn't figure out what had gone wrong between the two of them. It wasn't that he didn't love her - he did, but not in the way that she wanted him to. Harry had felt sure that he had wanted to start dating her but it wasn't until after they had begun seeing each other that he had realised he did not like her in that way.

Suddenly he heard the door open again and people enter the room. Taking yet another attempt to feebly open his eyes, he saw madam Pomfrey standing above him. She felt his head, looked into his eyes and asked him a few questions. A few moments later, she announced it was just a tension headache and that she would give him a draught to drink and he would feel better within an hour or two. She left and returned with the potion ten minutes later.

Once she had left, Harry snuggled back down into his duvet, waiting for the effects of the potion to take place, glad of the opportunity to sleep for a little longer.

"I have to go to Defence Against the Dark Arts. Are you ok?" Asked Ron, who had been sitting in silence cross the room from Harry.

"Yeah… You go." Harry replied. He listened for the other boy to leave the room and then he sighed. Although most teenage boys would be pleased to be missing a lesson, Harry couldn't help but feel disappointed. After all, Defence Against the Dark Arts was his favourite lesson and he didn't particularly enjoy lying around idly. The memory of his dream began to come back to him. He could see Sirius' face so clearly. The older man had looked no different from the last time Harry had seen him - still full of life. Christmas was quickly approaching and he knew he would have to spend the holidays at school on his own. Ron was going to Romania with his family to visit his brother and Hermione was going to Spain. He had had invitations from both of his friends but he could no longer stand watching his best friends being so happy at Christmas, with their families around them. It wasn't that he wished they did not have loving families, he just wished he could have the same thing. Although Mrs Weasley tried to treat him like a son, it just wasn't the same. Imagining what it would be like to spend Christmas with Sirius and opening presents together was a scene that had pulsed through Harry's mind various times ever since he had died, and it pained him that it could never become a reality.

A few hours later, the headache seemed to subside. He opened his eyes, bracing himself for the sharp pain to wrench through his brain but it never came. He stood up and looked at the time. It was almost lunchtime, so he decided to get up. That would give him an hour to get dressed and go for a walk before lunch. Fifteen minutes later, he picked up his wand from on top of his trunk and left the dormitory.

He walked past the great hall and stepped outside. The fresh, December air filtered through his lungs, making the last of his grogginess disappear. After walking for five minutes, he came to the lake. He stood still for a few moments, watching the ripples appearing on the surface from the wind brushing over it. Deciding he would rather sit down and enjoy the bitter breeze rather than walk any further, he sat down, still hypnotised by the beauty of the lake.

However, he did not enjoy the peace for long. He looked up and noticed Draco Malfoy and his goons approaching. He moved to the left so that he was hidden from view, still feeling slightly drained and therefore wanting to avoid a fight.

"No, Goyle. I've told you a thousand times. I need to do it for my father." Malfoy's cold voice rung through the air.

"But…"

"No. I have to. I have no other choice."

Harry wished he had his invisibility cloak. He wanted to know what Malfoy was doing that was so important to his father. Suspicion began to creep up him. He knew that Lucius Malfoy was one of Voldemort's closest followers and now that he was in Azkaban, he could no longer serve him. So Harry guessed this information was related to whatever it was that Malfoy had to do.

The three boys began to walk away. Harry fought with his curiosity for a few moments before realising there was no way he could follow them. Malfoy would see him, and although Harry was not remotely afraid of Malfoy, he didn't particularly want to be confronted by him whilst accompanied by his sidekicks.

Once he was sure Malfoy was out of sight, he stood up and began to walk inside.

Later on that evening, Harry found himself sitting in the library struggling to complete his charms essay. He hadn't paid attention in the previous lesson when Professor Flitwick was explaining the advantages of using a singing charm. Personally, he couldn't see how being able to make a teapot sing for hours on end could provide any kind of advantage to him at all and thought the charm was pretty pointless. After spending a while longer thinking about anything he could possibly gain from making an inanimate object make a lot of noise, he finally closed his book and began to stare at the wall.

He could have only been sitting there nonchalantly for about ten minutes before Draco Malfoy entered. Shooting Harry a malicious look, he sat down at a table across the room and pulled out some heavy looking books from his bag. Within minutes, he had picked up his pen and had begun to write. Harry watched him as complete concentration dominated the blonde boy's features and couldn't help remarking to himself how harmless he looked. The general dim lighting of the room combined with the sharp light next to Malfoy, shone over him accentuating the golden quality of his hair and defining his precise facial features. Harry wondered why he was alone. That wasn't like Malfoy at all. But then again, Malfoy did take his schoolwork seriously, that was one of the only things Harry could give him credit for.

Without warning, Malfoy suddenly looked up and caught Harry staring at him. Feeling his cheeks blush with embarrassment, Harry quickly looked away and pretended to read the essay that was in front of him.

"What you staring at, Potter?" Malfoy called, callously, from across the room.

Harry looked up once again. "Don't flatter yourself, Malfoy," he said, simply, before pushing the rest of his stuff into his bag and leaving the library.

The next few weeks flew past and before Harry knew it, it was the day before the Christmas holidays. He sat on his bed as he watched Ron finish his packing. Surges of regret swept through him as he remembered refusing the invitations he was given in the weeks leading up to Christmas. Although, at the time, he had thought he wouldn't mind remaining at Hogwarts for the holidays on his own, he was finally realising he did mind. Very much so. After offering Ron some help with his packing, and having his offer refused, he went downstairs to the common room to relax. Hermione was sitting in the armchair in front of the fireplace, watching two bewitched knitting needles knitting a small jumper.

"Hullo 'Mione," Harry mumbled as he suck into the chair next to her.

"Oh, hello Harry. I just thought I would knit a few more jumpers before I leave. I hate to think of all of those poor house elves who are going to be stuck here over Christmas," she replied with great enthusiasm.

Harry couldn't be bothered to try to explain to her that they would have nowhere to go even if they were freed because he knew the hassle he would get would be greater than the importance of telling her. Instead, he said nothing.

Hermione continued, "I was in the library yesterday, and I couldn't help but overhear what Malfoy was saying."

Harry perked up at this. He had not managed to shake off his suspicions from when he had overheard him a few weeks ago. "Why, what did he say? I knew he was up to something!"

"No, it was nothing like that. It was about his plans for the Christmas holidays…"

Harry looked at her, waiting for her to carry on.

"…Well, he's staying at Hogwarts too. He seemed pretty annoyed. He mentioned something about his mother having to attend some kind of gathering, or something…"

Harry's heart sunk. So not only did he have to spend Christmas without his friends, but he couldn't even escape his arch enemy for a couple of weeks. Suddenly, the thought of Christmas became a dread rather than a remote excitement.

"Well, the only reason I'm telling you is because I think you should try to stay out of his way. I mean, it's Christmas and you shouldn't let him bother you…"

"I'll be fine, Hermione. I can handle that git." Harry replied with a reassuring grin. Hermione leant over and hugged him at this point. Although Harry hated Malfoy, he couldn't help but realise that this could be an opportunity to find out what he was up to. He broke away from Hermione and focussed his eyes on the knitting that was taking place on the table in front of him and grinned. He knew she had a kind heart but she didn't always choose the right approach when it came to trying to help.

A loud noise came from the staircase and shortly after, Ron's case appeared at the bottom. Ron appeared shortly after it, looking slightly flustered. He kicked the trunk and then approached where Harry and Hermione were sitting and sat down next to them. They sat like that for a few minutes, just enjoying each others company before Ron and Hermione had to go and catch the train home. They said goodbye to each other and then Ron and Hermione left the common room through the portrait entrance.

It was at this moment that Harry realised that he was well and truly alone. 


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning brought a very lonely silence. Used to waking up to either the sound of his roommates snoring or the noise of them bustling around, it struck Harry as very odd that there were no sounds. Once the last trace of sleep had left him, he remembered that it was now the Christmas holidays and that he was the only person from that dormitory remaining at Hogwarts. Sighing, he sat up and got out of bed. He got dressed and then decided to go down to the great hall for some breakfast.

On entering the great hall, he was remotely surprised at the extent to which the hall was decorated. There hung gold and silver snow flake shapes along the walls and there were flashing lights coming from each corner. The next thing Harry noticed was that the four long house tables had been removed in favour of a much smaller table which had fourteen seats around it. Seven of which were already occupied. Dumbledore was sitting in the seat at the far end of the table, with McGonagall and Snape either side of him. In the other seats were two second year students from Hufflepuff, a young girl from Ravenclaw and of course, Draco Malfoy. Harry took a seat as far away from Malfoy as possible and smiled at Dumbledore, who had been watching him closely ever since he had entered the room. Dumbledore acknowledged his smile and stood up.

"Good morning, everyone. I thought I would just take this opportunity to wish you a happy Christmas holiday. There are not many of us here at Hogwarts, so it's important that every single person here works together to make it an exceptionally joyous one." He looked meaningfully at Harry and Malfoy, who were sitting at opposite ends of the table. "Right, let's have breakfast." At this command, food sprung from nowhere and the small table creaked under the strain.

Harry had been watching Malfoy throughout Dumbledore's speech and had been somewhat amused at his reaction. The constant rolling of the eyes and sighing was something Harry was accustomed to seeing Malfoy doing, but it was his facial expression that had amused Harry. As if he was a schoolboy who had been up to something mischievous. He had had the same glint in his eye, but it hadn't been aggressive. It was this small detail that had surprised Harry.

Once everyone had finished eating, they rose to their feet to leave the table. As Harry was leaving, Dumbledore called him aside.

"Harry. I know you and Master Malfoy have your differences, but it is Christmas, so I don't want to hear of any confrontations between the two of you." The older man breathed.

"Well, I won't start anything if he doesn't," Harry replied defiantly.

"Draco's having a hard time at the moment and I think all he needs is to be shown a little kindness, Harry. I know you are not cruel. I'm not asking for a miracle, I'm just asking you to be patient."

Harry hesitated. "Okay, I'll try."

Dumbledore smiled warmly at him, patted his shoulder affectionately and then left the hall. Harry remained there for a few moments longer wondering why Dumbledore had specifically asked him to try to be nice to Malfoy. The idea was ridiculous. Sure, Harry wasn't a cruel person, but Malfoy sure was.

Unsure what to do with the rest of his day, Harry eventually decided on getting his broomstick and going for a fly. School work would wait until tomorrow, after all.

When Harry reached the quidditch pitch, he noticed somebody else already flying around it. As he got nearer, he recognised the person as no other than Draco Malfoy. He took a seat in the stands to watch him fly. As he observed the other boy, he could appreciate that he was actually quite a good flyer. It wasn't his standard of flying that led him to always lose against Harry - it was his inability to work as part of a team. After watching him for about ten minutes, Malfoy flew towards him.

"What do you want, Potter?" Malfoy challenged.

"It's not illegal to sit in the quidditch stand, is it?"

"Well, why are you watching me then?"

"If you must know, I came out here to fly around the pitch a few times. But I noticed you were using it, so I thought I'd wait until you'd finished." Harry replied honestly.

Malfoy looked at him scornfully. "So you can't use the pitch while I'm on it? Scared I'll show you up?" He mocked.

Harry's temper flared a little. "I don't think so, Malfoy. Have you forgotten all those times I beat you at quidditch?"

"Chance, Potter. That's how you manage to survive dangerous situations. Pure luck. Do you honestly think you're any match for the Dark Lord?" He added spitefully.

"I'd rather die trying to defeat him than join him."

This seemed to touch a nerve. Malfoy flinched slightly and looked a little unnerved, However, within a matter of seconds he had regained poise, so Harry was unsure of whether he had just imagined it.

"Come on then, Potter. If you think you're so skilled…I'll get the snitch. We'll have a little match, shall we?" Malfoy said, his eyes glittering maliciously.

Not wanting to back down and show weakness, Harry instantly agreed. He picked up his broom and made his way down to the pitch.

Moments later, Malfoy had released the snitch and the two boys were prowling the pitch steadily for sight of it. Harry frequently looked over in Malfoy's direction for any signal that he might have spotted it. Suddenly, Malfoy pulled into a dive and Harry was close on his tail. They flew around the pitch, gradually building up speed, until Malfoy finally stopped, looked over his shoulder at Harry and smirked. Realisation hit Harry and he suddenly realised that Malfoy had fooled him into believing he had seen the snitch. Looking away from Malfoy, he once again resumed his search, knowing he could not let Malfoy win this. Malfoy begun to call insults out to Harry, forgetting about the snitch entirely. As he did this, Harry noticed a glint of gold just behind him. Not wanting to alert Malfoy to this new development, he cautiously made his way over there, trying not to look suspicious. As he reached the blonde boy, he gave his broomstick a spurt of speed as he lunged for the snitch.

Malfoy noticed far too late and had no time to react. Feeling the cold metal from the centre of his fist, Harry flew back to the ground, relieved that Malfoy had not won. He wasn't sure how he would have tolerated his constant gloating, had he won. Malfoy joined his seconds later, a hurt look on his face. Harry couldn't help but feel slightly guilty.

"Well done, Potter," Malfoy spat, "the precious golden boy has done it again." And with this, he turned and strutted away in the direction of the castle.

Harry was confused. Why was Malfoy so bothered that he had won? He usually beat him at quidditch anyway. It wasn't the outburst of aggression that had confused Harry, but the pained, hurt look that he had displayed in his eyes. Harry cast his mind back to what Dumbledore had said earlier. Why was Malfoy having a hard time? He hadn't seemed any different to Harry lately. He had been his usual spiteful self, as far as Harry could see. Picking up his broomstick, he followed Malfoy's route back up to the castle.

The days leading up to Christmas were uneventful and Harry felt miserable from boredom. He had not seen Malfoy for a few days now, ever since he had beat him in their mini competition. Harry couldn't help feeling the other boy was being slightly ridiculous about the whole thing, not coming down to meals merely because he caught the snitch first. He pulled the marauders map out of his trunk and muttered the words to enable it. Suddenly a map of Hogwarts appeared, and Harry's eyes drifted to Slytherin's common room. A dot labelled 'Draco Malfoy' was there, as usual. Harry wondered why Malfoy had not left the common room for three days. He couldn't still be bitter that Harry had beaten him, surely.

Beginning to feel restless, Harry looked at his marauders map once more. He was surprised to see that the dot with Malfoy's name underneath it had left the common room and was walking down one of the corridors. Hastily grabbing his invisibility cloak and putting the map in his pocket, he left Gryffindor common room.

His heart pounding in his chest, he moved at a fast pace down the corridor to find Malfoy. He was curious to know why he had not made any appearances lately. It was not that he particularly cared, he told himself, he just had nothing else to keep him amused. Looking at the map, he noticed that he had just entered a classroom that already had a dot labelled 'Severus Snape' in it. As he approached the classroom, he slowed down a bit, to give him time to catch his breath. Just as Snape was closing the door, Harry managed to quickly run through, still trying not to make a sound.

Harry looked around the room, wondering why they had chosen to meet here and not in Snape's office. He looked over at Malfoy, who had his back to him. Once Snape had closed the door firmly, he turned towards Malfoy.

"What is the problem, Draco? Why was it so urgent that you spoke to me?" Snape asked, the tone of resentment that he usually used with Harry, absent from his voice.

Malfoy turned around and Harry saw his face for the first time. When he saw him, Harry almost let out a gasp. Malfoy had always been pale but now he had reached a whole new level. He had dark circles round his eyes and he looked particularly fragile.

"I received a letter from a friend of my father's this morning. He said…" His voice began to crack. Harry suddenly felt extremely awkward at being present.

Snape looked concerned. "What did he say?"

"He said my mother had been attacked. Said she was in a critical condition…" His voice trailed off.

"How long have you known?"

"Two days. I've been waiting for more news but…" He paused. He sounded like he was struggling not to cry.

Snape nodded. "I understand. I'll ask Dumbledore for permission to take you to see her. Am I correct in presuming that she is currently at St. Mungo's?"

Malfoy nodded meekly.

"Okay. I'll come and find you once I have spoken to the headmaster." With this, the potions master left the room.

Once Snape had left the room, Malfoy slid to the floor and remained motionless. Harry felt desperately sorry for the other boy but obviously could not reveal that he had been there the entire time. He watched him as he placed his head in his hands. Harry was sure he was about to cry, but Malfoy did no such thing. Instead, he remained on the floor, completely still. Harry assumed this was what he had been doing ever since he had heard the news. Harry wanted to leave the room, but knew he had to wait until Malfoy left because he could not open the door. An excruciating twenty minutes later, Malfoy finally stirred and stood up. He opened the door, left the room and Harry followed him. Malfoy stalked off in the direction of the dungeons. Harry felt too guilty to spy on him any longer, so walked in the opposite direction. His mind was spinning. Who had attacked Malfoy's mother? And why? He supposed it was because their family was in league with Voldemort. Although he had never seen eye to eye with Malfoy, he still couldn't help but feel sorry for him.

Later on, he made his way down to the great hall, the earlier scene still spinning through his mind. He was not surprised to see that Malfoy was not there. He ate his dinner and then went outside for some fresh air. He walked in the direction of the lake, knowing that the sound of the water would relax him and allow him to think. As he approached, he noticed somebody was already sitting there. Recognising the person as Draco Malfoy, he hesitated as to whether he should continue walking or turn around and go back. Remembering Dumbledore's words from a few days ago, he decided to make an effort to be nice to the boy. It was almost Christmas, after all.

Harry coughed to signal his presence and Malfoy turned around. On seeing Harry, an automatic sneer manipulated his features.

"Potter." He merely stated, before turning around again.

Fighting the urge to walk away, Harry sat down.

Surprised to see Harry still sitting there, Malfoy turned to face him once more. "What do you want?"

"Is that all you can ever say to me?" Harry asked with a smirk.

Malfoy said nothing.

"Why weren't you at dinner?" Harry asked.

"Why do you care?" Malfoy challenged.

"I don't." Harry retaliated.

Malfoy turned so that he was facing the lake once more. Not looking at Harry, he replied, "Well, can you leave me alone then." The tone of his voice was expressionless. Harry would rather it been aggressive.

"Look, Malfoy, I know that we're not really friends or anything, but it is Christmas and…"

"…the Golden Boy has to be nice to everyone, is that it?" Malfoy snapped.

Harry struggled to hold onto his temper, knowing that losing it would only make the situation worse. He didn't say anything.

"Well, don't bother. Don't be nice to me."

"Why not?" Harry asked with curiosity.

"Just don't." Malfoy stated. Harry looked at Malfoy, and noticed, with alarm, that his eyes were glistening. Not with menace, like they usually were, but with pain. He also noticed that Malfoy would not look at him. The blonde-haired boy shivered. Harry wanted to talk to Malfoy about what had happened to his mother, but didn't know how to approach the subject without revealing he had been in the room when he had been confiding in Snape. He decided to ask seemingly innocent questions to prise the information out of him.

"So what's wrong?" Subtly was not a skill that Harry possessed.

"Nothing." Malfoy mumbled.

"Nothing? If nothing was wrong, then you would have probably thrown a curse at me by now."

Malfoy smirked a little before quickly restraining it.

"I don't want to talk about it."

Harry was stumped for ideas now. He could hardly continue to interrogate him once he had plainly been told to back down. Malfoy shivered again. Harry realised they should probably go inside now. It had suddenly become very dark and the wind was very bitter.

"Do you want to go inside?" Harry asked.

Malfoy shrugged.

"Come on, it's freezing out here."

Malfoy did not protest. Inside, he hauled himself to his feet and began to walk towards the castle. Harry quickly stood up and caught up with him. As they walked, Harry racked his brains for something to say. He hardly wanted to leave Malfoy alone, but at the same time, did not particularly spend any extra time with him either. After internally debating with himself, he decided not to be so selfish.

"Do you want a game of exploding chess?" Harry asked, as politely as he could possibly be towards his enemy.

Malfoy shook his head, without any trace of emotion. "I'd rather just go to bed." He stated. And with this, he turned around and walked away from Harry. Harry watched him go, feeling stabs of pity in his chest as the other boy vanished from sight. 


	4. Chapter 4

Author's note:  
Thanks for the reviews so far )  
Mega-quick update as it was either this or coursework. And I chose this :D

Hmmm basically just a chapter to establish Draco's state of mind a bit more. I didn't want to write it in his point of view, as I wanted it to have the same kind of flow as the books.

Enjoy.

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It was six days into the Christmas holidays now and Harry had still not started his vast amount of homework. However, it was the day before Christmas, so he figured he would do it in a few days. He had spent the past two days practising his quidditch techniques and reading up on interesting curses in the library. He knew he would regret wasting his time like this, but at that precise moment in time, he really did not care. The majority of his thoughts had been based around Draco Malfoy, Harry's long term rival. Although he hated him more than he had ever hated anyone, he still felt desperately sorry for him. Harry had regularly checked the marauders map to check on Malfoy's whereabouts, and apart from hours at a time when he could not be found on the map at all, he spent all of his time in Slytherin common room. Harry supposed that he was visiting his mother when he could not be found on the map.

He glanced at the marauders map for the seventh time that day and saw that Malfoy was now in the library. His heartbeat picked up a pace. It was all well and good while Malfoy had stashed himself away in his common room, but now that Harry finally had the opportunity to speak to him, he had no idea what to say. However, he decided that he ought to take the risk, so stood up and exited the common room through the portrait entrance.

Once he reached the library, he began to feel slightly nervous. It was not the thought of seeing Malfoy that made him nervous, but the knowledge that he might still be fragile. Being a typical male, Harry did not know how to talk about his feelings and did not know what to say when other people spoke about theirs. He pushed open the door and his eyes immediately fell upon Malfoy, who was sitting on a chair, flicking through a book. He did not see Harry.

Harry approached him, still unaware of what he was going to say when Malfoy saw him. He figured he would just improvise. Malfoy turned around. The usual sneer he wore on his face was vacant and he looked merely tired.

"Are you ok?" Harry asked.

"What is with the sudden concern, Potter?" Malfoy asked in return.

"I just…" Harry did not know how to respond without revealing he knew about his mother, "I just haven't seen you around much lately."

"Miss me, Potter?" Malfoy asked sarcastically.

Harry rolled his eyes. Malfoy was one of the most unapproachable people he had ever met. Even when he was trying to be nice to the git, he did not seem to notice.

"Well, it's not much fun spending days on-end alone, is it?" Harry tried to reason.

Malfoy shrugged. "I've wanted to be alone lately."

"Why?"

Malfoy looked at him. He looked almost frightened, Harry thought. He seemed so vulnerable, and it was completely out of character.

"I just have." He paused. "So is that why you're here then? Because your friends aren't here?" He asked coldly.

"No." Harry replied honestly. "I'm here because it's Christmas and it's not healthy to be cooped up in your common room for days on end."

Malfoy looked shocked. "How do you know where I've been spending my time? Been stalking me, have you?" He accused.

Harry thought quickly. "No, I'm just guessing, that's all."

Malfoy did not look fully convinced. However, he seemed to accept the reply because he looked away from Harry as if it was the end of the conversation.

"Are you coming down for the celebratory meal?" Harry asked.

"No." Was the simple reply.

Harry did not bother trying to argue with him. Instead, he tried changing the subject.

"So what are you doing for the rest of the evening?"

"Why?" Malfoy asked defensively

"It's called conversation, Malfoy. It's not supposed to be an interrogation."

"It feels like one." Malfoy stated.

"Are you really this stubborn?" Harry asked.

"No."

"There you go again." Harry grinned.

Malfoy suddenly relaxed a little. His posture became less erect, and he slumped into his chair slightly, looking more comfortable. Harry took this as a positive sign. He changed the subject to quidditch, a topic they were both passionate about. Malfoy was reluctant to engage in any sort of conversation at first, and Harry found himself seemingly talking to thin air. But in time Malfoy began to engage a little, although Harry still found himself dominating the conversation.

They sat there until it began to get dark. Harry changed the conversation back to the present.

"The celebratory meal starts soon." He mentioned.

"I told you, I'm not going." He affirmed obstinately.

Harry laughed. "You're doing it again."

"Doing what?"

"Being stubborn."

Malfoy grinned. A few moments subsided and he returned to looking glum once more. Harry was concerned.

"What is it?" Harry asked him, expecting Malfoy to put his barriers up once more.

Malfoy hesitated. "Nothing. I'm just tired."

Harry was disappointed. He had not expected Malfoy to tell him but had tried asking again anyway. His thoughts were interrupted when Malfoy stood up.

"I want to be alone for a while." And with that, he left the library. Harry was slightly taken back by his abrupt exit. However, he decided to take the opportunity to look up some information that he needed for his Charms essay. He figured that it was not really work but it would make the essay easier to write when he finally got round to doing it. He browsed the library shelves until he found sound books that he thought would be appropriate.

Three hours later, he looked up from his book. Looking at the time, he saw that it was 10 o'clock. Realising that he had definitely missed dinner, he decided he would go back to his dormitory and get an early night. Taking out the marauders map from his pocket, he checked it, mainly due to habit. He was confused to see that Malfoy was in an otherwise empty classroom a few corridors away from the library. Wondering what he was up to, he picked up the parchment with his research on it and left the library.

Once he had reached the classroom, he opened the door cautiously, not wanting to startle the other boy. He did not immediately see him, so he entered the room, scanning his surroundings. Suddenly he noticed Malfoy sitting on the floor muttering to himself. Harry cleared his throat to make his presence known, but Malfoy did not react. He approached the blonde haired boy sitting on the floor, but he still did not look up. After observing the situation a little more closely, Harry realised why. Clutched in Malfoy's hand was an almost empty bottle of Fire Whiskey and on second inspection, Harry realised that Malfoy was completely drunk.

He sat down in front of Malfoy and faced him. A few moments later, Malfoy finally noticed him and looked into his face. He looked totally dishevelled and his hair was in a range of disarray, which was unusual for Malfoy.

"Malfoy?" Harry said gently.

"I don't want her to die." He said simply. His eyes filled with tears and he said nothing more.

Harry knew that he was struggling to hold it together because of the copious amounts of alcohol he had consumed. Instead of trying to encourage him to talk, he just wrapped his arm round his shoulders and comforted him like he was a small child. Malfoy began to shiver violently. Harry suddenly noticed the cold temperature of the room. He had to make a quick decision about what to do. Obviously, he couldn't just leave him so he decided to take him back up to Gryffindor common room. He couldn't think of anywhere else where it was warm and where they wouldn't be seen. He knew Malfoy would be in a lot of trouble if he was caught in this state. Harry was not quite sure why he cared, but he did.

Harry hauled Malfoy to his feet and shifted his arm so that it was round his shoulders so that he could support him. He found that the other boy could barely stand, so it was a struggle to get him to walk. Thankfully, he didn't have to pull him up any stairs.

Once they reached the portrait of the fat lady, Harry gave the password and hauled Malfoy through the entrance. Malfoy fell over and Harry staggered under his weight. He regained his poise and continued to move towards the sofa in front of the fireplace. He sat Malfoy down so that he was comfortable and asked him if he needed anything. Malfoy shook his head violently and then fixed his glaze upon the flames which were dancing vividly in the fireplace. Harry watched him for a few minutes observing the extent to which the boy in front of him had fallen to pieces over the past few days.

Harry gave Malfoy some water, hoping this would help him to become sober a bit more quickly than he would have done otherwise. He watched as he began to fall asleep and decided he should get him to bed now. After all, there were plenty of empty beds in the dormitory.

"Come on, Malfoy. Bed." Harry's voice rung out.

Malfoy stirred. "What?"

"Bed." Harry repeated.

He pulled Malfoy to his feet and helped him up the stairs. This took a very long time to do, as Malfoy kept sitting down on the stairs and Harry had to keep coaxing him to move. After what seemed like hours, they had finally reached the dormitory.

Harry sat Malfoy on Ron's bed and tugged at his jumper to remove it. He figured he could sleep in his t-shirt and underwear and take off his jumper and trousers. When he had removed his jumper, he was horrified at what he saw. Cuts ran all the way up to Malfoy's elbow on his right arm. Harry stared at the cuts with shock.

"How did this happen?" Harry asked tenderly, trying to hide the shock from his voice.

Malfoy looked at him numbly. He simply said, "I can't stand it," his voice still very slurred.

Harry found the silence that followed excruciating. He looked into the other boy's face and watched as his eyes began to fill with tears once more. He was beginning to get an idea of just how much he was hurting.

"But why?" He asked uncertainly.

Malfoy looked at him, his eyes were very unfocused from the amount of alcohol he had consumed. "You wouldn't understand," he slurred, "Perfect Potter. Always catches the snitch, never does anything wrong." He was beginning to sway as he spoke. "There's no point."

Harry was not sure what he was referring to by the last bit, but decided not to ask questions. After all, he was completely wasted. Instead, he made a 'shhh' sound to try to silence him once more and got him into Ron's empty bed.

Once Malfoy was lying down and had closed his eyes, Harry turned to leave the room so that he could use the bathroom before he went to bed.

"Where are you going? Don't leave me." Rang out across the room.

"I'm not leaving. I just need to go to the toilet. I'll be back in a minute," Harry gently reassured him. Malfoy seemed satisfied with this reply and closed his eyes again.

Harry sighed. This situation was much worse than he had originally anticipated. 


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Note:

Updated earlier than intended because I won't beable to update until the end of next week, as I'm going away and won't have access to a computer.  
Thanks for all the reviews so far.

Now getting to the whole relationship bit ;)

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Harry woke up the next morning, after having dreamt about the events of the night before, to the sound of somebody being horrifically sick in the bathroom next to the dormitory. He sat up and immediately saw the stack of presents sitting by the foot of his bed. Getting out of bed, he decided to go and see if Malfoy was alright.

"Malfoy? Are you ok?"

Malfoy turned around and looked at him cynically. "Well, do I look ok?" And with that, he swung his head back round to the toilet where he began to puke again.

Harry went back into the dormitory, allowing him to have some privacy. He sat on his bed, waiting for Malfoy to re-enter, feeling too guilty to open his presents. Five minutes later, Malfoy re-emerged looking whiter than ever with bright red eyes.

"How did I get here?" He asked.

"I found you last night in a classroom, so I brought you back here." Harry replied.

"So, you were following me? I said I wanted to be left alone." He stated mechanically.

"I didn't follow you. I found you and thought you might appreciate some help."

"Unlike everybody else, Potter," he spat, "I don't want…don't need to be saved by you."

Harry watched him as he spoke. He wanted to bring up what he had seen last night, but he knew that Malfoy would not talk about it. Harry did not particularly want to bring it up either, but he could not just leave it.

"I didn't save you…only you can do that." He said. "But last night…the cuts on your arm…how did they happen?" He asked stupidly.

"Fell over." Malfoy mumbled, suddenly not as confident anymore.

Harry stepped in front of him. "Is it because of your mother?" He asked bravely.

Malfoy looked horrified. "What?! How did you know?! You have been stalking me, haven't you? I bet you loved this. I bet you've told the weasel and mudblood already, haven't you…" He was furious.

"No. You said so last night," Harry lied, "And don't be stupid…I'm not going to tell anyone. But, the cutting? Why?" He asked.

Malfoy was stunned. "Because…" he begun, "I can."

"Well, if you put it that way, then so can I. But I don't."

"It's alright for you, isn't it Potter. Everybody loves you…you're their hero. But what about me? I have a father in Azkaban and a mother who is critically ill. My mother is the only person who has ever truly cared or even loved me and she's going to leave me now."

"You still have your father." Harry reasoned.

"He's in Azkaban. And even if he wasn't, so what? He only wanted a son to carry on the family name. To train to become a death eater. Not for the reasons people usually want children. I'm not his son, I'm his project." Malfoy shouted.

"My parents are dead, too. In case you had forgotten." Harry said quietly.

"But they loved you while they were alive. Christ, they even died to save you. The whole of the wizarding world adore you. Don't you even DARE turn this round on you."

Harry was stumped. He had completely run out of arguments. Malfoy looked at the floor and slumped on to the bed. Harry approached him cautiously and sat next to him on the bed. Malfoy's breathing, which was hard only moments before, began to slow down. Harry looked at the other boy and noticed that he had tears in his eyes and he looked well and truly defeated. He felt a pang of sorrow in his chest as he observed him.

"Sorry, Malfoy."

He did not seem to acknowledge Harry, but instead sat in silence. Minutes later he looked up and pointed to the pile of presents with a nod of his head.

"So, are you going to open your presents then?"

"Maybe later. Do you want to go back to your dorm so you can get yours?" Harry asked, trying not to disregard the fact that Malfoy was actually trying to be nice.

The blonde's nose crinkled. "No point. There won't be any there."

Harry remembered all too well a time where he never got any presents. But then he reminded himself that he had got presents, just not anything he wanted in the slightest. A present that sprung to mind was a pair of his Uncle's old holey socks. Remembering how he felt at Christmas each year when this happened only increased the pounding of sorrow in his chest for Malfoy.

"Do you want to do something else then?" Harry asked.

"No, I'd rather just go back to my common room." Malfoy said.

"Look, Malfoy. It's Christmas day. I don't know about you, but I don't want to spend the day alone."

"We're not even friends." Malfoy stated.

"Well, no. But like I said, it's Christmas, and I don't think you should be alone right now."

Malfoy jumped up. "I don't want your pity." He spat.

Harry also got up. He grabbed the other boy's wrists and spoke to him gently. "I don't pity you, Malfoy."

The boys shared a few moments of eye contact, completely forgetting where they were and the situation they were in. Harry was brought back to realisation first and broke the silence.

"Please stay?"

Malfoy resigned with a small nod. Harry sat back down and waited for Malfoy do join him. When he did, Harry tried to think of something for them to do.

"Are you going to open your presents then?" Malfoy asked him.

"No, they can wait." Harry replied.

Malfoy looked at him and gave a slight, grateful smile.

"I need to get changed and have a shower. I'm going to go back."

"Do you want me to come?"

"Uh, if you want to." Malfoy shrugged.

Within ten minutes, the two boys were walking side by side down the corridor which led to the dungeons. Upon reaching Slytherin common room, Malfoy gave the portrait the password and they entered. The common room had not changed much since second year, when Harry took polyjuice potion alongside Ron to impersonate Crabbe and Goyle. Malfoy nodded to one of the sofas.

"I won't be long. Do you want to just sit down or something?"

Harry did not reply verbally, but sat down. Malfoy disappeared up the stairs and Harry waited patiently. An hour passed and Harry began to wonder what Malfoy was doing to take him this long. Images of a drunken Malfoy crossed through his mind and he decided to go and check on him. He walked up the stairs, wondering what he would see when he pushed open the door at the top.

Harry opened the door and poked his head round. What he saw almost made his heart stop.

"Malfoy!" He shouted and he rushed towards him. He grasped the blade from the boy sitting on the floor hurriedly before it could make contact with his pale skin. Malfoy looked horrified that he had been caught just as he was about to harm himself. Harry looked at him questioningly, his mind still reeling from what had just happened.

"She's…she's…" Malfoy's lip began to tremble. He looked seriously ill.

"What?" Harry asked, crouching down so that his face was equal with Malfoy's.

"Dead." Malfoy said simply, before wrapping his arms around his legs and placing his head on his knees. Harry's heart almost gave way. He noticed the letter bearing the bad news lying on the floor. Not knowing what to do or say, he acted on instinct. He knelt next to Malfoy and put his arms round the fragile boy's body. Harry had half expected to be pushed away, but no such thing happened. Instead, Malfoy leant against him and begun to cry. He pulled the boy towards him tighter and rocked him slightly, as if he were a small child, and made a gentle 'shhh' sound.

After the two boys had sat like that for some time, Malfoy's crying subsided. He brought his head up and wiped his face. Harry pulled away from him to give him some space.

"Please don't tell anyone." Malfoy whispered.

Harry was taken back by Malfoy's vulnerability. "Course not."

Malfoy stood up and Harry realised that he had neither showered or changed his clothes. He realised that he must have received the news as soon as he entered the room. He could have kicked himself for not checking on him sooner. Harry stood up as well.

"Are you ok?" Harry asked.

Malfoy's eyes glazed into his. All Harry could see was pain and despair. The moment was intense. Slowly, Malfoy leant his face towards Harry's, resting his lips upon his. Harry felt a surge of elation sweep through him. He completely forgot who he was and what was happening as his mind began to swim. He kissed him back, entangling his fingers in Malfoy's hair. Malfoy placed one hand on Harry's back and another behind his head to support him. Harry deepened the kiss, feeling a twinge of desire when Malfoy moaned in response. He brushed his lips against Malfoy's open ones and slipped his tongue into his mouth. Malfoy moaned, bringing his tongue to meet Harry's.

Suddenly Malfoy's eyes flew open and he pulled away from Harry. He looked frightened at what had just happened.

"Malfoy…" Harry began.

"Can you go now" He said to Harry.

Harry was extremely confused. How on earth did he end up kissing a guy who he hated up until yesterday? He had no idea what had possessed him to respond to that kiss.

"Go" Malfoy repeated.

Harry did not want to leave Malfoy while he was this helpless. He dreaded to think what he might do if he left.

"I'm not leaving you, not like this." He stated.

"JUST GET OUT!" Malfoy shouted.

Harry decided that perhaps it was better to let him calm down. He supposed his mind was reeling, just like his was.

"Ok. Please don't do anything stupid though."

Malfoy did not even look at him. Harry walked towards the door, opened it and walked down the stairs. As he walked back to his common room, his mind raced. What had just happened? Why had Malfoy just kissed him? Why had he kissed him back? 'I don't even like guys' he thought to himself. He told himself that it was because he had felt so sorry for Malfoy. However many times he told himself this, he could not shake off the element of doubt.

Once he got back to his common room, he flounced onto the nearest armchair and he closed his eyes, unable to think of anything other than Draco Malfoy. 


	6. Chapter 6

Over the next few days, Harry's mind remained primarily focused upon Malfoy and what had happened a few days ago. He knew he should be worrying instead about the approaching school term but nothing he did could deter his thoughts. He was also worried. He had no idea what Malfoy had been doing to himself over the last few days and had no idea whether he was alright. The last few days had been spent doing nothing in particular - just lounging about trapped in his own thoughts. Malfoy had not been to any meals lately either. Harry was not surprised about this - he had long stopped going to meals even before their kiss.

Harry woke up exactly five days after his kiss with Malfoy and found he could not stand yet another endless day spent in his common room. Stuck for nothing else to do, he decided to go to the owlery to visit Hedwig. He had not heard very much from Ron and Hermione over the holidays and felt extremely isolated as a result of not having anyone to spend his time with.

On his walk to the owlery, he subconsciously found himself being drawn towards Slytherin common room. Before he knew it, he was standing in front of the portrait. He paused for a brief second, wondering whether he should knock or whether he should just give the password he had heard Malfoy use the other day and just enter. Deciding that Malfoy would probably be angry if Harry just entered uninvited, he decided to knock instead.

Harry knocked on the portrait entrance and waited patiently for a reply. After hearing no response, he called out his name. He listened carefully, dread beginning to fill in his chest. Screwing all of his courage together, he gave the entry password and proceeded to enter the common room.

The overwhelming stench of alcohol hit him hard as the portrait flew open. The lights were very dim and Harry could not see very much. He entered the room cautiously, looking out for any movement. His eyes then rested on Malfoy, who was sitting on the floor beside one of the couches, his eyes wide open and staring at the wall opposite him. Harry sat down next to him but said nothing. Silently, he put his arm round his shoulders and Malfoy responded by placing his head on Harry's left shoulder.

"What's happening to you, Malfoy?" He asked tenderly.

"There's just no point anymore."

"Sitting around in the dark getting drunk isn't going to make anything better."

"No, but it helps." Malfoy slurred.

"But it doesn't though, does it."

"But I'm all alone." And with this, Malfoy began to cry. Harry felt embarrassed as he had the last time but did not act upon it.

"No you're not. You have… your friends." Harry reasoned.

"Friends? It's all a show, Potter. Nothing's real."

"What do you mean?"

"Oh come on. All of their parents are death eaters. Do you honestly think any of them would even want to know me if their fathers weren't afraid of mine?"

"Don't be stupid."

"I'm not. I know that if it was free choice, they wouldn't be friends with me."

"How do you know that?"

"The only time I've ever tried to make friends with someone who wasn't somewhat involved with he-who-must-not-be-named, I was rejected."

"Who was that?" He couldn't think of anyone in Slytherin that Malfoy was not friends with that he might have wanted to be.

Malfoy looked at him for the first time. "You."

Harry was shocked. He had completely forgotten about that. After all, it was years ago and with all the animosity that had built between them over the past years, he had completely lost sight of why the bitterness was there.

Harry hesitated. "I…don't know what to say."

Malfoy shrugged. "Well, it really doesn't matter anymore."

"But…"

Malfoy interrupted. "Look, Potter. You made it clear that you didn't want to know me and I accepted that. I wasn't prepared to diminish my reputation by begging for your friendship. You couldn't have made it any clearer that you hate me, so why are you here? If it's to make me feel stupid by using this against me at a later date, then you needn't bother." Harry was struggling to understand because the other boy was slurring so badly.

"I don't hate you." Harry said quietly.

Malfoy stared at him, with his eyes and mouth wide open. His facial expression was exaggerated due to the amount of alcohol he had drunk. "What?"

"I thought I did. I thought you were cruel and hateful. But now…" Harry was surprised at how honest he was being, but felt in control because he was sober and Malfoy was not.

"This had better not be because you pity me."

"No, it's not." Harry knew he was lying slightly, but it wasn't a complete lie. Although he did feel sorry for Malfoy, there was something about this new Malfoy that he could not possibly hate. "Come on, lets get you to bed…sleep off some of this alcohol."

Malfoy remained silent as Harry hoisted him to his feet and led him to the couch. After laying him down so that he was comfortable, he placed a blanket over him and watched as the other boy fell asleep. As he looked at the sleeping boy, he could not see the vulgar, arrogant and selfish boy that Harry knew. As he studied his face, he noticed his beautifully pale skin and relaxed features and felt guilty about the situation he was in.

A few hours later, Malfoy began to stir. He gradually sat up and looked at Harry questioningly. "How did you get in here?" He asked him. Harry realised he obviously did not remember what had previously happened.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, dismissing the other question.

"Dizzy. I need some water."

Harry got Malfoy some water and sat beside him. He suddenly did not feel as bold now that Malfoy was sober.

"This has got to stop." Harry said.

"Why? It doesn't really have anything to do with you. I didn't ask you to come here. I don't want to be saved." Malfoy sniped.

"I don't understand you, Malfoy, I really don't. Is all of this just because of something that happened when we were eleven?" Malfoy said nothing. "You've got to let it go."

"So that's what you want is it? For me to suddenly adore you like everybody else does? Forget it." Malfoy said spitefully.

"I don't want adoration." Harry could feel his face getting closer to Malfoy's.

"So what do you want then?" Malfoy asked, not sounding quite as bitter anymore.

Harry responded by pushing his lips against Malfoy's. He was not thinking rationally, but was acting upon instinct. As his lips connected with Malfoy's, his head became dizzy and his thoughts became blurred. Malfoy did not react for a few seconds, so Harry opened his lips slightly and deepened the kiss. After what felt like ages, Malfoy responded by parting his lips slightly and kissing Harry back. The kiss was slow and passionate and Harry fought to keep control. He let his lips slide over Malfoy's, encouraged when he heard the other boy respond as he increased the pressure.

Both boys were so engrossed in the kiss that neither of them realised how intense it was until Harry was pushing Malfoy onto his back. Malfoy resisted at first, but eventually gave in, lying down and wrapping his arms round Harry's torso. Harry nestled his body in between Malfoy's legs which were now parted. He opened his eyes briefly to look upon the person he was kissing. On opening them, he recognised the familiar flawlessly pale skin and perfectly proportional features. The only word he good think of to describe the person he saw was beautiful. He had never seen Malfoy in this way before and it unnerved him slightly.

He closed his eyes once more and continued to kiss the other boy. He entangled his fingers in Malfoy's hair, which was not gelled back and immaculate as it usually was. Harry liked Malfoy's hair this way; it made him seem almost softer. Harry began to pull at Malfoy's jumper, signalling that he wanted to take it off. Malfoy hesitated at first but eventually sat up so that Harry could remove it. Once Harry had removed the piece of clothing, the cuts on Malfoy's arm were hideously noticeable once more. Malfoy saw Harry staring at them in shock and immediately tried to cover them.

"They're repulsive." Malfoy mumbled.

Harry took his arm and pushed his lips against the cuts near his wrist. He kissed them tenderly, planting small kisses all the way up his arm. Once he had reached his elbows, where the cuts stopped, he looked into Malfoys eyes. "No they're not."

Malfoy quickly pushed his face towards Harry's once more and resumed the kiss. Harry pushed Malfoy back yet again so that he was knelt over him. They began to kiss each other hungrily as they became increasingly excited. Malfoy wrapped his legs round Harry's middle and pulled his body towards his. He then began to gyrate his hips slightly to increase the amount of contact between them and ensnared his fingers into Harry's tousled hair.

Harry touched Malfoy's chest and stomach, feeling every muscle and the smoothness of his skin. He realised that he had actually become very skinny, probably from the amount of meals he had skipped. He traced his fingers lightly over his stomach, enjoying the moans being emitted from the other boy. When he reached the waistband of Malfoy's trousers, Malfoy stopped the kiss. Harry opened his eyes and was instantly met by Malfoy's grey ones. He looked into his eyes, eyes flicking side to side, trying to read the Slytherin's silent gaze. Malfoy remained silent but he did not have to say anything for Harry to understand. The look in his eyes displayed fear and pleading. Harry began to pull away, not wanting the other boy to feel uncomfortable. Malfoy grabbed Harry's left wrist to prevent him pulling away completely.

"Don't leave." Malfoy whispered.

"Is this what you want?" Harry asked him.

Malfoy paused before answering. Eventually he nodded. Harry was not convinced.

"You don't have to do this just to get me to stay." Harry said, suddenly realising what Malfoy wanted.

Malfoy's rigid body relaxed considerably once Harry said that.

"I don't want to be alone anymore. When I'm alone, I can't stop thinking." He confessed.

Harry nodded, immediately understanding. He had felt the same once Sirius had died. He had not wanted to be with people in fear that they might talk about it, but being alone was haunting. Thoughts of Sirius would penetrate his mind and there was no distraction.

Harry shifted his body so that he was next to Malfoy, rather than on top of him.

"Do you ever wish you were someone else?" Malfoy asked him. Harry was surprised by the randomness of the question.

"Sometimes." He answered, not sure how to respond.

"I do."

Harry didn't know how to react to that confession. "Why?" He asked, at a loss for what to say.

"I watch people, you know. At meals, in classes, outside school. And one thing that strikes me when I watch them is the warmth."

Harry was confused. "The warmth?"

"Yeah. And before I go to sleep, I just imagine I'm someone else. I imagine that people like me. I imagine that I'm worth something. I imagine…" Malfoy paused, "I imagine that I'm like you."

Harry stared at him in utter amazement. "Like me? But you hate me! Why would you want to be like me?"

Malfoy snorted slightly. "It's stupid, isn't it? But I watch how others react to you. The way they all admire you and fall over themselves to talk to you. And your friends."

"What about them?" Harry asked, genuinely confused.

"They don't like you because they have to, or because they're afraid of you. Or even because you're the precious boy-that-lived. They're friends with you because they've chosen to be. You can just be yourself because you know that people actually care about you."

Harry was amazed at how insecure Malfoy was. He had always seen him as being confident and arrogant. He was beginning to see Malfoy in a whole new light. It was as if he was a different person. He could not get their earlier kiss out of his head and he found it amazing that they were sitting here as if it had not even happened. They remained lying in the silence until Harry broke it.

"So you hate me, but you also wish you were me?" Harry asked, knowing how stupid he sounded.

"I don't wish I was you." Malfoy quickly contradicted.

"Fine. You imagine you were like me, then. But you hate me."

Malfoy remained silent.

"You do hate me, don't you?" Harry questioned.

"No, Potter. I absolutely despise you."

Harry looked at Malfoy and was reassured to see that he was grinning. He smiled at seeing Malfoy smile and looked away again. They lay like that for a little while, just enjoying the silence and the presence of another person.

"Potter! Wake up!" Harry felt himself shift back into consciousness and opened his eyes to see Malfoy looking at him.

"What?"

"You were shouting out in your sleep."

Harry sat up. He had not even meant to fall asleep. As he pulled himself up, his arms shook. He suddenly began to remember his dream. He felt clammy and sweaty. Malfoy looked concerned.

"You were shouting out 'Sirius.'"

Harry nodded. Sirius still haunted his dreams, even now. Each time he dream about him, he always woke up shaken and sweaty. He suddenly felt embarrassed as he sensed Malfoy watching him. He tried to act alert and cheerful, to prove he was ok. The boys remained silent. Harry changed the subject to something else that was on his mind.

"What happens now then?" Harry asked. Malfoy looked uncomfortable but Harry needed to know.

"That was blunt." Malfoy said, a blush forming across his cheeks.

"Well, there's no point beating around the bush."

"I don't want anyone to find out about any of this." Malfoy stated.

"Are you ashamed?" Harry asked.

Malfoy began to look irritated. "Fuck sake, Potter. It's not a point of being ashamed. Have you not even been listening to what I have been saying for the last few hours? Do you know what my father would do to me if he found out I had been…you know…with the fucking boy-who-lived? Do you know what would happen to my family? To my reputation? We're supposed to be on opposite sides of a war. It's not just a point of not liking you. I'm not allowed to like you."

Harry was annoyed by Malfoy's outburst. "So that's it? Game over? Malfoy doesn't want to play anymore so it's all finished?"

"Don't you understand? We can't do this. We just can't." Malfoy reiterated.

Harry tried a different approach. "So you don't want it?"

Malfoy bit his lip. After a few moments, he spoke slowly. "I didn't say that."

Harry pulled him towards him by pulling his arm. He placed a firm kiss on his lips and looked into his eyes. "Malfoy." He listened to the word as it rolled off his tongue. "I don't like that word."

Malfoy looked at him with confusion in his eyes. He also looked a bit hurt. "What's wrong with it?" He asked defiantly.

Harry was amused by how defensive he sounded. 'Oh, don't get me wrong. It's a beautiful name," he teased, "But it's just not you."

"So who am I then?"

"You're Draco."

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Author's Note:

I don't really know about this scene. It's a bit on the long winded side, but I'm trying to get all the 'getting to know each other bit' out of the way so that I can get onto the good stuff. Just bear with me ) Any comments? Please review.

Really appreciate all reviews so far! 


	7. Chapter 7

Author's Note:  
Thanks for all the reviews so far. Means a lot.

Slash scene :

-----------------------------

By Saturday, two days before term was due to start, Harry's homework situation was becoming desperate. He had not even started the large mountain of work that he had to do - mainly because he had been so preoccupied with his former enemy. He left the common room in the early evening, figuring he could get some work done in the library.

When he entered the library, he began to shiver. It was very cold in the room, probably because of it's lack of use over the festive period. He sat down at a table near the fireplace and spread his books and parchment across it. He positioned himself so that he had easy access to all of his materials and began to think of how to answer his transfiguration essay. It was not long before his mind began to wander and he started to daydream. He wondered what Draco was doing. It had been such a tender moment when Harry had told him he wanted to call him Draco. He could still picture the way the other boy had looked. Harry could only describe it as pure intensity. His eyes had displayed emotions of longing and passion, something Harry had never seen in the other boy's face before.

He closed his eyes and began to replay the kiss in his head. He could almost feel the way Draco had run his fingers across his face and through his hair. Hear the way that he had moaned against his lips. Smell his fresh, natural scent. Draco's scent had surprised Harry - he had always expected him to smell 'expensive', doused in some kind of exclusive cologne. But instead, he had just smelt clean. Harry smiled at this stereotype.

He was not sure how long he sat there absorbed in his thoughts of Draco, but he was suddenly awakened from his daydream.

"So, this is where you've been hiding."

Harry's eyes shot open and he gasped, reacting before his brain had had an opportunity to register the voice. Upon seeing Draco, he let out his breath that he had taken in and relaxed. Draco smirked.

"Were you looking for me?" Harry asked.

"No." Draco replied rather harshly.

Harry was rather taken back by the tone of his voice. "What's wrong, Draco?"

Draco looked unnerved. His previous confidence was obviously diminishing. "I've been thinking. What we've been doing is…wrong. It needs to stop. Now."

Harry felt as if he had been punched. "What?" Was the only sense of speech he could muster.

"Everyone else comes back to school tomorrow. I was upset…confused. You took advantage of me." He stated.

Harry was shocked. How could he even suggest he had taken advantage of him? He looked at the boy standing in front of him. He had regained his poise and cool nature that he had possessed before his mother had died. He no longer looked fragile and weak as he had done over the last few days. But however much Draco tried to deny his actions over the past few days, Harry knew that a sensitive, caring person lurked under this indifferent mask.

"This isn't you." Harry said.

"Yes it is." Draco replied monotonously.

"No."

"You don't even know me."

"Oh, but I do." And with this, Harry screwed his all of his courage together and kissed Draco, in a last attempt to win him over. At first, the other boy did not react. He seemed to be trying very hard not to respond to the kiss. However, Harry was determined not to give up until he was pushed away. He placed one hand on Draco's cheek and the other one on his back and pulled him towards him. It seemed to be Harry's touch and the way he was holding him that caused Draco to give in.

The two boys stood next to the table where Harry had been trying to do some homework, kissing each other passionately. Draco had wrapped his arms round Harry's neck and stroked the back of his head. Harry parted his lips slightly as he kissed the other boy and slipped his tongue into Draco's mouth. Draco shuddered with excitement and brought his tongue up to meet Harry's.

Harry, the stronger of the two, picked Draco up by grasping both of his legs, either side of him, and positioned him so that his legs were wrapped round his waist. He took a few steps so that he was standing directly in front of the table and Draco's back was facing it. He lowered the other boy slowly onto the table, not pausing the kiss at all. Once Draco was perched on the table and Harry was standing in front of him, Harry pushed him onto his back so that he was lying down. Draco broke the kiss to shift himself further onto the table so that he was comfortable and then grabbed the collar on Harry's shirt and led him back to his mouth. Harry ran his fingers over Draco's hair and realised he had gelled it back once more into his former brazen hairstyle. He was disappointed at this as he had loved to touch his hair when it was soft and natural.

Draco seemed just as caught up in the kiss as Harry was. He ran his hands over Harry excitedly, absorbing every detail. Suddenly, something inside Harry snapped and he found it impossible to remain controlled and calm. He started kissing Draco frantically as his excitement increased. The other boy responded by kissing Harry faster, fuelled with sexual hunger. As Harry kissed Draco, he became aware that his penis was becoming increasingly hard and had began to throb with desire. He lowered his hand to Draco's trouser area, encouraged when he saw that he was experiencing the same feeling. As he ran his fingers over Draco's penis through his trousers, Draco whimpered longingly. His longing to satisfy both his and Draco's needs overtook his nervousness from his inexperience, and he began to undo the button on Draco's trousers, not breaking the kiss. The other boy did not protest but allowed him to do it.

Half expecting Draco to push him away at this point, Harry was relieved when he did no such thing. He took off the other boy's trousers completely and threw them on the floor. He then resumed his position on top of Draco and continued the kiss, grateful that there was more skin for him to touch. He stopped the kiss suddenly and got up so that he was kneeling in front of Draco, who was lying down, on the table. Draco went to get up but Harry promptly pushed him back down.

"You're not going anywhere." Harry murmured, a seductive smile playing on his lips. He looked down at Draco, who was now sprawled across the table, his previously ordered parchment and books now an array of mess. He noticed with vague amusement the bulge in the other boy's boxers and decided it was time to take things one step further.

Suddenly, Draco froze. "Did you hear that?!"

Harry listened attentively. Footsteps could be heard from along the corridor outside the library. The boys froze and remained impossibly still and silent for a few seconds. Upon realising that somebody was definitely coming that way, they gave one silent fearful look at each other before jumping up off the table. Draco grabbed his missing articles of clothing and dashed into one of the aisles so that he was hidden from sight.

Moments later. Madam Pince bustled in. She saw Harry, who had quickly picked up a book and was now pretending to read, and had a quick glance around to see if there was anybody else there. She then looked back at Harry and told him that the library would be closing in half an hour. He reassured her that he was almost finished and she left the room.

As soon as she had gone, Harry jumped up to go and find Draco. When he found the aisle he was hidden in, he approached him and planted a firm kiss on his lips.

"Now, where were we?"

Draco looked horrified. "No, we can't. She'll be back in a minute."

Harry chuckled and went down on his knees so that he was level with the bulge in the shorts of the boy standing in front of him. He massaged it lightly and heard Draco gasp with pleasure. He tugged the bottom of the boxers so that they fell down. He looked at the erect penis in front of him and then looked up at Draco. Seeing him with his eyes closed, he returned his attention back to his cock. Placing his hands around the base, he ran his tongue over the head, spurred on by Draco's moaning. After teasing the blonde like this for a while, he put his mouth firmly around it. As Harry continued to pleasure Draco using his mouth, he became aware of him locking his fingers in his hair. He also became aware of Draco moaning much louder and knew he was close. Harry carried on pleasuring Draco in this way until he had begun to start shouting. Not wanting to be caught by the librarian, he pulled his mouth off of Draco and replaced it with his hands. To muffle the other boy's shouts, he began to kiss him, while wanking him off fully. Draco kissed him frantically, impelled by his forthcoming orgasm. He fell back against the bookshelf, pulling Harry with him. However, he was so lost in the moment that he did not even seem to notice.

As Draco came, he pulled his mouth away from Harry's and shouted out. Harry continued to wank him until he had finished his orgasm. Once he had finished, Draco went limp against Harry and he held him close. When he had finished panting, he pulled away from Harry and looked into his eyes. Harry broke the tender moment.

"We'd better go. Madam Pince will be back soon."

Draco nodded a silent agreement and hastily put his clothes back on. Harry went back to the table he had been using earlier and started to pack up his work. So much for using this evening to get some work done - he had barely even picked up his quill!

Five minutes later, the boys left the library and they walked in silence. The atmosphere was much more awkward now as they both thought about that evening's events. Draco suddenly stopped and Harry turned to look at him. He noticed that he would not even look at him.

"Do you still think I took advantage of you?" Harry accused.

Draco shook his head, keeping his eyes firmly fixed on the floor.

"So what's wrong?"

"I told you earlier," Draco looked at him for the first time, "we can't do this."

"We just did."

"We nearly got caught."

"But we didn't."

"But we nearly did. Do you know what would happen to me if anyone found out? I would have no life left."

Harry was annoyed. "You didn't seem too bothered 20 minutes ago."

Draco looked angry. "And I bet you'll enjoy telling everybody that." And with this, he stormed off. Harry contemplated whether to just let him go, but realised he probably shouldn't just leave him like this. He chased after him.

"Look, Drae. I'm sorry, ok?"

Draco turned around abruptly and just watched him. Harry took this as his cue to elaborate. "I'm not going to tell anybody. Is that what you're worried about?"

"It's not just that," Draco admitted slowly, "There's other stuff as well."

"Like what?"

"Well…you're a…boy."

Harry looked at him questioningly. "Yes…"

"Well, up until now, I'd never even thought about doing anything with another guy."

Harry nodded. "Neither had I."

"Well, why us? We hated each other."

Harry shrugged. "You can't help who you fall for."

Draco looked up sharply. "I am not falling for you."

Harry felt a twinge of hurt but did not react on it. "Well, I'm not falling for you either, but I'm just saying."

"Right, well, see you later." Draco said monotonously

Harry did not stopped him this time. He watched him walk away, still upset at how Draco could be so mean. Although it would not have bothered him before, it did now. He couldn't help but wonder if he really was falling for Draco.

The next day, Harry woke up knowing that it was today that everybody would return to school. He was torn as to whether he wanted them to come back. Sure, he loved his friends, but he knew that nothing would be the same with Draco once they did. But then again, what did he even have with Draco? One minute, they were practically having sex on a table and the next, Draco wanted nothing more to do with him. Harry could not help but feel slightly betrayed.

The day passed in a blur and Harry could not stop thinking about yesterday's events long enough to do any homework. He knew he would regret it, but at this particular moment, he did not even care. His pride stopped him from going to find Draco, despite how much he wanted to see him.

Finally, it was 6 o'clock and the students that had been away for Christmas began to bustle in the corridors. Harry was sitting in the common room as people began to enter.

"Hey Harry. Good Christmas?"

"Hi, Neville. Yeah, not bad, thanks. You?" Harry replied automatically.

"Fantastic." He replied, before heading upstairs to unpack his things.

This was how Harry responded to each greeting he got as people entered the room. Eventually, Ron and Hermione entered.

"Harry!" Hermione shouted, before running up and giving him a huge hug.

"Alright, mate?" Ron asked.

"Hi. How was your Christmas?" He asked them.

They replied and then asked him about his. He made sure that he did not let anything about Draco slip. They then all went upstairs to the boy's dormitory. When they reached the room, Hermione pointed at him untouched presents on the floor by his bed.

"Why didn't you open your presents?" She asked, looking rather upset.

Harry felt very guilty. "Oh…I was…erm…waiting for you to come back. I didn't…want to open them all by myself." He lied. He did not think that saying he was 'busy' would be a good enough excuse.

"Aww, Harry." Hermione said. She then gave him another hug. "Open them now."

He opened his presents, whilst being watched by Ron and Hermione. He thanked them both for the presents they had given him and made a mental note to thank others who had given him one.

"I'm hungry. Lets go and eat." Ron said suddenly. Hermione rolled her eyes. "What?! I'm hungry!" He persisted.

Harry laughed. It was nice having his friends back.

Once they reached the main hall, Harry noticed that the huge house tables that had been removed over the Christmas holidays were now back. He sat down at Gryffindor table alongside Ron and Hermione and looked over at Slytherin table. He immediately saw Draco in the middle of his friends, talking loudly. 'Showing off' Harry thought to himself. Suddenly, he heard someone shout out.

"Oi, Weasel! Have a nice Christmas? Is it true you all had to share a room in your house?" The voice said. Harry turned around to see that it was Draco who had shouted out. Ron had gone red and Pansy Parkinson screeched with unkind laughter.

"Shut it, Malfoy." Harry shouted, annoyed at how he had just spoken to his friend. Draco looked taken back but said nothing.

"Are you going to let him talk to you like that?" Pansy demanded.

Draco whispered something to her in a harsh tone and she quickly shut up. Harry wondered what he had said, but did not dwell on it. He turned to Ron.

"Wow…how did you do that?" Ron asked in amazement.

"What?"

"Get Malfoy to shut up."

"Dunno." Harry replied before shovelling his plate full of food. He took several more glances over at Slytherin table, but Draco would not look at him. 'Why did he have to be so cruel?' Harry wondered. He knew that he was not really like that but he did not think he would ever change. He wished he could stay the same way as he had been over the holidays.

With a sigh, he knew that nothing would ever be easy as far as Draco was concerned. But he was up for a challenge, he decided with a grin. 


	8. Chapter 8

Author's Note:

Thanks for all reviews so far.

Sex scene ahead.

Have a great Christmas, everyone!

--------------------------------------------------

Harry could not help but keep looking at Draco the next morning at breakfast. As he watched him, he could not imagine the vulnerable, heart-wrenching boy he had spent time with previously. He appeared to be exactly the same as he was before the holidays. He could not help but feel slightly annoyed - it was not that he wanted him to be upset but he had honestly thought he had changed. How wrong he had been. He could hear Draco's voice and laugh clearly amongst all the other people sitting at the table as he showed off to all of his friends. He watched as Pansy clung onto his arm and whispered things into his ear. The pang of jealously he could feel in his chest was unbearable. It was the last straw when Pansy kissed him on the cheek and this was when Harry decided he had had enough. Without explaining anything to his friends, he stood up abruptly and stormed out of the great hall.

Just after his had exited the hall, he stopped by a pillar and rested his forehead against it despairingly. How could Draco do this to him? Although he had told him he felt nothing, Harry could still not help but feel betrayed by what he had seen in the hall. He quickly put his head up straight as he heard people coming. When he saw it was Draco and Pansy, he quickly turned to walk in the other direction. However, he apparently was not fast enough.

"Oi, Potter!" A voice screeched. "You're a bit touchy lately, aren't you?" Pansy mocked.

"Get lost, Parkinson." Harry shouted over his shoulder, as he walked away.

"Did you hear that, Draco? Potty's been throwing his weight around a lot lately. Perhaps you should teach him a lesson." Pansy trouble-stirred.

Harry turned around, interested to see what Draco would do. Still bitter from a few days ago and annoyed by what he had seen this morning, he had no sympathy for what situation he was in. "So what you gonna do then, Malfoy?" He scorned.

"Go on, Draco. He's asking for it."

Harry waited for Draco's prolonged reaction. He stood there, just watching Harry, biting his lip nervously. Suddenly, he turned to Pansy. "Why don't you just give it a rest. I can fight my own battles. I don't need you to give me tips." He stole one last glance at Harry and then turned around and walked in the opposite direction. Pansy stood rooted to the spot for a few seconds, horrified at how he had just spoken to her. However, she soon recovered and she began to chase after him.

Harry was surprised at what had just happened. He had not expected Draco to walk away like that. But then again, what had he expected? Harry was not entirely sure. Looking at his watch, he saw that it was time for his first lesson of that term - Potions. Groaning inwardly, he begun the walk to the dungeons.

When he got there, he was surprised to see that he was rather early. The only other people there were Draco and Pansy. It seemed Pansy was sulking because she said nothing to either Harry or Draco. Harry profoundly refused to look at Draco, keeping his eyes firmly fixed on the floor.

"Pansy, can you go and get my Potions book? It seems that I left it in the common room." Malfoy said. Pansy began to protest but after one haughty look from Draco, she gave in and begrudgingly walked away in the direction of Slytherin common room. As soon as she had gone, Draco spoke once more, this time to Harry.

"So, Potter." Harry looked at him when he used his surname. "What was that about at breakfast?"

"What was what about at breakfast?" Harry asked in return.

Draco sighed. "You know… when you stormed out of the great hall."

"I'm just sick of being used." He replied aggressively. Draco closed his mouth and said nothing. "Everybody wants a piece, don't they? Harry Potter. The boy-who-lived. The celebrity. It's bad enough when people I don't even know only talk to me because of what I did when I was a baby. Without people who I thought I could trust walking all over me. I bet you were having a right laugh at me. Harry Potter, what a sucker. He'll believe anything I tell him." He paused, taking a deep breath after this outburst.

Draco appeared to be taken back by this explosion. "What happened between us… it had nothing to do with you being the 'famous' Harry Potter." He reassured.

"Oh, so why was it then? It's not even like you like me" Harry said. He was all too aware of Draco gradually coming closer to him. He tried to fight the urge to kiss him, knowing he had to stay strong. But having Draco this close to him made him feel light-headed and weak.

"Don't I?" Draco breathed, his mouth only centimetres away from Harry's.

Harry opened his mouth to reply, but was silenced by Draco pushing his mouth against his. Any resistance Harry had had in him, disappeared at this contact. He leaned into him, not being able to pull away. He had missed Draco over the last few days and it felt so good to be kissing him once more. Draco begun to kiss him harder and more hungrily and he raced his fingers through Harry's hair. Harry made one feeble moan of protest but then gave in completely, holding onto Draco by his hips and pulling him closer. Draco pushed him rather forcefully against the wall and grabbed his hands, pinning them above his head. Harry moaned again in protest of not being able to touch Draco but was ignored.

A noise from down the corridor made Draco jump away from Harry hastily, quickly running his fingers along his own hair, to make sure it was not out of place. When Pansy turned round the corner, he smiled in an edgy manner.

"I couldn't find it." She said.

"Find what?" Draco asked, genuinely confused.

"The book." Pansy said, raising her eyebrows.

"Oh, yeah. It was in my bag. Sorry about that." He replied. Pansy looked a little miffed but said nothing. Moments later, the door to the dungeon swung open and Snape appeared, telling them to go inside. Shortly after, everybody else turned up. Snape began to tell them about their next assignment, but Harry was having great difficulty in paying any attention. His eyes kept drifting over to where Draco was sitting. He could not help but remark to himself how perfect he looked, sitting under a stray ray of light. The light accentuated his milky complexion and made his hair look even more golden than usual. As Harry was admiring him, Draco turned around and saw Harry staring at him. He touched his lips seductively and Harry could feel himself becoming aroused. Realising he would not be able to overcome the embarrassment of becoming aroused in Potions, he quickly turned away, trying to clear his mind of thoughts of Draco.

The lesson passed impossibly slowly and eventually, they were released. Checking his timetable, he saw that he had a free period next. He stood by the doorway, waiting for Ron and Hermione and then Draco walked past him, brushing himself against Harry as he walked past. He felt him slip something in his hand but acted as if nothing had happened. Once Draco had gone, he made sure no one was looking, before looking at what he had been given.

'By the lake, next period. Don't be late' was all that the note said. Harry quickly stuffed it in his pocket, not wanting any attention to be drawn to it. Only one person saw this exchange, but Harry was not aware of it. Smiling to himself, he waited for his friends to join him and then left the dungeon. As they walked back to the common room, he tried to think of a reason why he would have to leave them during their free without them wanting to go with him. This problem was soon solved.

"Right, I'm going to go to the library. Do you two want to come?" Hermione asked.

"Yeah." Ron grunted.

"Erm…no. I've got other things to do…see you later though, yeah?" With this, Harry smiled at them and walked away, in the direction of the lake. He knew he would be early but he was not entirely sure whether we would be able to get away later. He arrived at the lake and sat down, shivering as the cold January air swept over him.

Ten minutes later, he saw Draco approaching. He stood up and walked towards him, rubbing his hands together to try to warm them up. As he reached Draco, he pulled him towards him to kiss him but was roughly pushed away.

"Not here!" Draco hissed. "Somebody might see us."

Harry felt a bit hurt. "Would that be so bad?"

"Would it be that bad? It would be a disaster!"

"But why? I mean, I understand what you said about your father, but he's in Azkaban now. He can't get to you." Harry reasoned.

"Don't be so stupid. Of course he can. There's other complications."

"Like what?"

"Why is everything one big bloody interrogation with you?" Draco shouted. "Why don't you just leave it!" Harry could tell he was really angry. He decided to drop it.

"I'm sorry."

Draco turned around and gave him a piercing look before aggressively kicking a can lying on the floor. Harry flinched as it hurled in his direction, but it did not hit him. At this point, Draco sat on the floor, breathing deeply as if trying to get rid of his anger. Harry decided he should wait a bit before comforting him physically. After all, he did not want to be on the receiving end of one of his volatile explosions. After a few minutes, when his heavy breathing had slowed down, Harry spoke again.

"Do you want to move somewhere where we won't be seen?" He asked. Draco nodded and stood up. Harry led the way to the edge of the forbidden forest and Draco followed him. They sat down and looked into the distance, creating an awkward silence between them.

"What exactly is going on? I want to know where I stand." Harry asked assertively.

"What do you mean?" Draco quickly asked.

"Well, first of all, we hated each other and then we got really close. But now, we avoid each other as much as possible and the only time you ever acknowledge me is when we're alone."

"It's really difficult. No one can ever find out."

"I know. You've already said. I don't want anyone to find out either." He said quickly. "But can I ask you something?"

"What?"

Harry dreaded the answer to the question he was about to ask, but he needed to know. "Do you hate me?"

Draco looked at him sarcastically. "What do you think?"

Harry could not help but feel upset. He had tried to prepare himself for this. He had told himself that he had meant nothing to Draco, but could not help but hope it was something more. He turned away, aware of the tears forming in his eyes.

"What's wrong?" Draco asked.

"Nothing. I have to go." Harry stood up. Draco also stood up. "There's no point in me being he, is there? You've used me for what you wanted, so now we can just go back to being enemies." He walked away, sure that this was the end. He stopped when Draco grabbed him by the wrist.

"What is this about?"

"You tell me. After all that's happened, you still hate me?"

"What? Harry, I don't hate you." Draco said slowly. Harry turned around so that he was facing the other boy.

Harry felt the tears beginning to form once again, but this time from relief and happiness. He smiled and rubbed his eyes, not being able to even consider crying.

"Oh, come here." Was all that Draco said before he pulled him towards him. He held him close for a few minutes before pulling his face away so that he could see Harry's. With his right hand, he brushed any stray hairs out of Harry's face before planting a firm kiss upon his lips. Harry responded eagerly, wrapping his arms around Draco's waist, glad of the extra warmth. Draco wrapped his cloak around Harry, aware that he was cold. After kissing for a while, Harry pulled away.

"I've got to go." He breathed.

"Me too."

"Do you want to meet up later?" Harry asked hopefully.

"Where, though?" Draco asked fearfully.

"Don't worry, I'll make sure no one will find us." Harry reassured, knowing that this was what the problem was.

"Ok."

"I'll let you know later, ok?" Harry said. Draco nodded and Harry placed one last kiss on his mouth before turning around and walking back to the castle. They had agreed that they should not be seen walking together to avoid arousing suspicion. Once he was inside the castle, Harry began to walk to Charms straight away, hoping he was not too late.

Harry was only too glad when it was finally the end of the school day. He had seen Draco and whispered the location of the room of requirement to him. Draco had not looked convinced but had nodded anyway. It was now 5.55pm, five minutes before they had arranged to meet. Harry walked past where he knew the entrance was several times chanting 'I need a place where no one will find us' in his mind. Eventually, a doorknob that was not there before appeared. Draco turned up within the next minute, and they entered the room together. Harry closed the door after him. He looked around the room, noticing how plain it looked. He realised that this was probably because he had merely asked for a place where they could not be found. He made a mental note to be more specific next time.

"What is this place?" Draco asked, looking around in disgust.

"The room of requirement." Harry replied simply.

"Well couldn't you have required something more…tasteful, then?"

Harry sighed and closed his eyes to require a different place. When he opened them, he noticed the room was much more grand than before. The walls were now cream, decorated with magnificent paintings and symbols. The carpet was fluffy and soft, a deep red colour. There was a fireplace on the far side of the room but it wasn't any of this that attracted Harry's attention as much as one particular object. In the centre of the room was a large, king-size bed with rich red covers and curtains.

"I said 'tasteful', Potter."

"What's wrong with this?"

"It's Gryffindor's colour."

"Oh, don't be so fussy." Harry replied. He walked over to the bed and sat down, feeling it's utmost comfort. He looked over at Draco was who standing up straight, with his arms crossed, a sulky expression dominating his facial features. Harry laughed. "Come here."

Draco turned his head away, pretending he had not heard him. Harry got up, still laughing, and walked over to where Draco was standing. He took his arm and gently pulled him over to the bed. Draco was not putting up much of a fight but was still not prepared to admit that he wanted this. Harry pushed him on the bed and then crawled on, straddling the sulking blonde. He then leant forward and kissed him. Draco remained unresponsive. Harry persisted, determined to win this game that Draco was playing. He kissed him harder and gyrated his hips to stimulate the other boy. He opened his eyes to see how Draco was coping. The look upon his face told him that he was going to give in soon. His nostrils were flared and his cheeks were flushed. Harry pulled away for the kiss and begun to kiss Draco's neck instead. This obviously seemed to be one of Draco's weaknesses because he immediately gave in, and moved his head down so that he could meet Harry's lips with his own.

Draco pushed Harry so that he was lying on the bed and he was now on top. He pulled at Draco's jumper until it came off completely. He was horrified to see that there were fresh cuts.

"Draco?"

"Mhmm?" Draco responded as he continued to kiss Harry's neck. He did not look up, he was too engrossed in Harry.

"Are you still cutting yourself?" Harry asked, with concern in his voice. Draco abruptly looked up but said nothing. "Why?" Harry asked.

"It doesn't matter. It's not important." Draco mumbled.

"Yes, it is. I thought you were happier now? What's changed?"

"What's changed? Nothing's changed. That's what." Draco said as he got off of him.

"But you cut when your mother died. You were devastated, not yourself at all. But lately, you're back to how you were before. I thought you were ok now."

"I didn't start cutting when she died." Draco mumbled, looking at the bed.

Harry was taken back. "But I thought…"

"Well, you thought wrong then." Draco concluded.

"Why then?"

"You wouldn't understand."

"Try me." Harry was desperate to understand what Draco was going through. "How long?"

Draco hesitated. "About four years." He said quietly.

Harry's head began to spin. "Four years? I never had any idea."

"Well, why would you. We've never exactly been close have we."

"Well, no…but I never saw any signs."

"And what signs would you be looking for then?" Draco asked. "Me sitting in a corner crying all day long? Not being able to defend myself? I am not weak, Potter." He spat.

Harry could tell he was getting upset. And this was the only way he could let it out - aggression, spite. He could not believe he had not seen it before. He knelt up and positioned himself so that he was in front of Draco. He run his fingers along the side of his face, soothing him with his touch.

"It's ok. You're ok." He smiled. And then he kissed him again, picking up where they left off. Draco kissed him back longingly, pushing Harry on his back. He pulled Harry's jumper off so that they were both topless and they touched each other's chests as they continued to kiss. Both boys were extremely aroused by now and Harry could feel his hard penis pressing against the boy on top of him. The intensity of the kiss remained unnoticed until Draco began undoing Harry's trousers. Harry did not stop him, too excited to gather any kind of resistance together. Harry's trousers were thrown on the floor, and the bulge became much more pronounced. Draco leant down and planted small, sucking kisses over Harry's stomach, who begun to moan with yearning. Draco dragged it out, going exceptionally slowly. Harry was losing his mind lying there. He began to unbuckle Draco's trousers, not entirely sure where this was going.

Once Draco's trousers were lying alongside Harry's on the floor, Harry brought his hands up so that he could cup them around Draco's pulsing penis. He massaged it slowly, excited when Draco jerked his head back. He fastened the pace of this massage, sitting up so that he could kiss Draco's chest. He could tell Draco's orgasm was approaching and he wanted to make it even better for him. He stopped.

"No, don't s-stop." Draco moaned.

"I want you inside of me." Harry said in a seductive voice

Draco looked nervous. "But we don't have any lubricant."

Harry pointed at the lubricant that had just appeared on the table next to the bed. "This is the room of requirement, remember."

Draco leant over and took hold of the container. He smeared it over his penis and using his fingers, stretched Harry out, spreading the lubricant in Harry's opening. Putting the pot down, he looked at Harry. "Are you sure?" He asked him. Harry nodded.

Draco began to kiss Harry again, pulling down Harry's boxers as he did so. Harry was nervous but he knew this was what he wanted. Once both boys were naked, Draco positioned Harry so that he could access him. As he pushed into him, Harry winced from the pain. He had never done anything like this before and he had not imagined that it would hurt this much. He breathed in sharply, trying not to cry out. Draco leant down and placed a tender kiss on his lips.

"You ok?" Draco asked. Harry nodded. Draco pushed all the way in and then began to pull out, moaning with pleasure to match Harry's moans of pain. Just as Harry was regretting his offer, Draco touched something inside of him that brought him intense pleasure. Draco smiled and began to thrust harder. As the pleasure increased, Harry became less aware of what was going on. He opened his eyes to see that Draco had taken Harry's cock in his hands and was beginning to pump it in time with his thrusts. Harry thrusted his hips in time and had to bury his fingers into the bed sheets, feeling as if he was falling over the edge. As Harry came, he shouted out, unable to keep any kind of control over his body any longer. Draco came moments after, spilling his hot load deep inside of him.

Suddenly, Draco withdrew from Harry and went limp. Both boy just lay there, panting loudly. Draco, who was lying on top of Harry, brought his head up, looked into Harry's eyes and just smiled. Harry had an overwhelming urge to say that he loved him, but held back. Instead, he kissed him. A long, slow and passionate kiss. The kiss lasted several minutes before Draco pulled away and buried his head into the crook of Harry's neck. He closed his eyes and Harry watched him, his heart thumping. As Draco fell asleep, Harry took in every detail of his face and remarked to himself just how beautiful he was. He wanted to kiss him but did not want to awaken him - he looked so peaceful.

Harry's mind soon began to wander from the perfection of the situation and began to wonder about why Draco found the need to cut himself like that. Harry could not understand how causing yourself pain could in anyway help you when you're already hurting. Pain was something he associated with negativity, not something he enjoyed. How could anyone possibly enjoy pain? He did not want to keep pushing Draco though. It was obviously a sensitive subject - he usually got annoyed whenever Harry asked him.

Looking at the clock, on the wall opposite the bed, Harry saw that it was now 9 o'clock. Alarmed that it was so late, he woke Draco up, knowing that they needed to get back to their dormitories.

"Wha?" Draco mumbled, his voice still muggy from sleep.

"Come on, we need to go back. It's getting late." Harry said.

Draco got up and quickly cast a cleaning spell on himself, Harry and the bed. He then put his clothes on. Harry also got up and got dressed. He felt a slight tinge of pain in his backside but ignored it. They stood by the door and kissed goodbye before they left the room. They agreed that Draco should go first and Harry would follow a few minutes later. Draco left, giving one last glance at Harry. Harry waited several minutes before also leaving the room.

As he walked back to his common room, he could not believe what had just happened. He had just had sex with his former enemy, Draco Malfoy.

And he did not regret it one bit.

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A/N (again…didn't want to write this at the beginning because of spoilers)

I'll probably deal with the person who saw the exchange in the next chapter or so. I haven't just dismissed it.

It feels like I'm going round in circles at the minute, but I hope it shows that their relationship is making progress.

Comments? Suggestions? Please review. 


	9. Chapter 9

Thanks again for the reviews. Wanted to update a bit sooner than this, but it's been kind of hectic lately, what with Christmas and all that.

Bit of a shorter chapter this time, but I didn't want to add in too much unnecessary text - it removes the focus from the important stuff.

Well, that's my opinion anyway. Enjoy:

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During the next few weeks that followed, Harry felt a strange sense of happiness that he had never felt before. His relationship with Draco was almost perfect. Factors that prevented it from being truly perfect were that they had to keep it all a secret. And of course this caused the second factor - that they were unable to spend as much time together as Harry would like. However, this meant that every minute they did spend together was special.

Harry had thought about the secrecy of the relationship for a long time now. Although at first, he would have been mortified for anybody to have found out he was 'seeing' Draco, he was beginning to come round to the idea. He knew that telling people was not an option though - Draco would never forgive him. Every waking minute was spent thinking about Draco and he just wanted to announce it to everyone. He had not seen Draco properly for a few days now. The only times he had seen him were in lessons, where they had to profoundly hide their feelings. He glanced at his marauders map to see what Draco was doing. Seeing that he was alone in the boy's bathroom by the transfiguration classroom, he grabbed his invisibility cloak and dashed off to see him.

His feet pounded down the empty corridor as he rushed to the bathroom. Quickly looking around to make sure no one was there, he entered the room. Immediately seeing Draco by sinks, he took off his cloak. Draco turned around, sensing the presence of another person. He didn't react when he saw Harry. Harry could tell something was wrong.

"Draco?" He asked as he walked up to the boy. No other words were needed.

"It's my father." Was all he said.

Harry knew it was not good news. The first thought that crossed his mind was that perhaps he had died. But after studying Draco's face, he realised it did not display sadness. It displayed fear.

"What about him? You're scaring me, Drae." Harry asked with genuine concern in his voice.

Draco paused before answering him. "He's…he's escaped."

Harry's eyes widened. He knew this was not a good thing. The only question was how long he was going to wait before he came for Draco.

"Have you heard from him?" Harry asked urgently. Draco shook his head and lowered his eyes. "You're safe here." Harry told him, before taking him in him arms and holding him close. Draco did not resist but allowed himself to be held by the other boy. Moments later, Draco broke away.

"I've got to go and see Professor Snape." He told Harry.

"Do you want me to come?" Harry asked.

"No, better not. He wouldn't be very impressed would he?"

Harry knew this was a referral to them having any other relationship than being enemies. "I could wear my invisibility cloak?" Harry offered.

Draco thought about this offer before replying. Eventually he nodded.

The two boys set off in the direction of the dungeon. Harry, at Draco's insistence, had put on his invisibility cloak before they had left the bathroom. Once they reached the door to Snape's office, Draco stopped and took a deep breath before knocking. The curt reply to enter came and Draco pushed the door open. Harry followed him in. Snape was sitting at his desk and looked up as Draco entered the room. He did not say anything.

"You asked to see me?" Draco asked, in a hardened voice.

"Yes. That's right." Snape replied, as he stood up. He moved across the room so that he was standing in front of Draco.

"What is it?"

"I want to know what's happening between you and Potter."

Harry froze in complete and utter shock. How did he know? Draco seemed to be having the same reaction. He no longer looked cool and indifferent, as he had when he had first entered the room. He quickly tried to regain his poise.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Severus." Draco replied, looking at him defiantly.

"I've been watching you, Draco. Very closely, in fact. And I could not help but notice certain things."

"Such as what?"

Snape seemed to be getting very irritated. "The way you and Potter look at each other. Also, a few weeks back when you passed him a note as you left the room. You think you can fool me?"

Draco said nothing but waited for Snape to continue.

"I suppose you've heard about your father escaping from Azkaban? I don't think that he would be pleased to hear of his only son befriending the Dark Lord's greatest enemy, do you?"

"No, I don't suppose he would. But seeing as that is not the case, there is no need to worry." Draco replied coldly, looking at Snape defiantly.

"You do know that he asked me to keep an eye on you before he went to Azkaban?" Snape asked him gently. Draco shook his head. "Well, perhaps I should have… a little look?"

Harry knew that he was referring to using legilimency. He immediately began to fear for Draco's situation. He need not have worried though. As Snape began to use legilimency, he suddenly stopped. He then gave a small laugh although it was obvious he was not amused.

"Oh, so you've mastered occlumency then? I cannot say I am surprised." He said quietly.

Draco, again, said nothing. The silence that followed was extremely tense and Harry was beginning to wish he had not come. What if Snape discovered him hidden there? The game would be up. He hoped Draco would leave soon. As if reading his mind, Draco spoke.

"Well, if that's all, Severus, I'll be going now." Draco said calmly. Snape nodded begrudgingly.

"I'll be watching you, Draco." Was all he said before turning away. Draco turned and left the room, Harry following him. Draco began to walk down the corridor towards the bathroom they had originally been standing in. Harry followed him. Once they reached the bathroom, Draco spoke.

"Harry?" He called, to see if he was still there. Harry pulled off his cloak but did not respond vocally. Draco spoke once more. "How did he find out? I don't believe this…it's a disaster." He put his head in his hands but remained still.

"I think you threw him off the track." Harry reassured.

Draco brought his head up. "Of course I didn't. He knows. He's just biding his time, that's all." He paused. "Oh god, he's going to tell my father, isn't he?"

Harry did not know what to say, so he said nothing.

"How could I be so stupid? I knew this couldn't work. Wouldn't work." Draco muttered as he began to pace.

"It could be a while yet before your father comes for you. He isn't going to just march into Hogwarts, is he?" Harry tried to reassure him. He touched his arm lightly to comfort him. Draco pulled away from his touch.

"This needs to end. Now." Draco said. However, he could not look at Harry. Harry knew he wasn't just worried about his reputation this time - he was worried for his own life. Although it was painful for him to accept, deep down, he knew Draco was right. He nodded mechanically, picked up his invisibility cloak and silently left the bathroom. He numbly walked back to his dormitory, unaware of anything going on around him. The only good thing happening to him had come to an end. As he entered his common room, he blanked the greetings that his friends gave him, not really hearing anything that was going on around him. Once he was safe in his dormitory, he lay on his bed and closed his eyes. All he could see was visions of Draco. After laying there for some time, he drifted into an uneasy sleep.

A few days passed without Harry seeing Draco at all. He had stopped going to meals, unable to face seeing Draco. The greatest thing he feared was that Draco would be back to his old, obnoxious self. The reason he could not face this was because it would confirm a thought that kept nagging him - Draco did not have any true feelings for him at all. This thought was the one that he could not stand. He was not sure why it hurt him so much, but it did. His thoughts were interrupted by a tapping on the window. He looked up and saw an owl outside. He stood up and walked over to the window to let it in. Detaching the letter from it's leg that it held out, he gave the owl a treat and then let him go. He watched the owl fly away and then turned his attention back to his letter. He opened it with curiosity.

'I need to see you. Come to the bathroom where we last met as soon as possible. D' was all that the note said. He wondered what Draco wanted. Putting on some shoes and his invisibility cloak, he left the dormitory. His heart pounded in his chest as he approached the bathroom. He was seriously considering turning around and going back but he kept going anyway. Once he was stood outside the bathroom, he took several deep breaths before entering. Once he was inside the room, he removed his cloak.

Draco watched him as he came into view. The looked at each other as they anticipated what was going to happen next. Draco finally spoke.

"I'm going." Was all that he said.

"Going? Where?" Harry asked, with a puzzled expression on his face.

"To join my father."

Harry felt as if Draco had punched him in the face. He wished he had done. Anything would be less painful than this. Draco waited for Harry to say something but when it became apparent that he was going to say nothing, Draco spoke again.

"I have no other choice. He contacted me and insisted that I return to him now." He said.

"No, you can't." Harry said after a few minutes. He knew it sounded lame, but could not think of anything else to say.

"I have to." Draco mumbled quietly.

"So you're going to help kill me now? Well, why don't you just do it now? Go on. I'm sure your father will be really proud of you." Harry said, his hurt turning into anger. He could feel tears forming in his eyes and willed them to go away.

"I'm a Malfoy. You knew this day would come, as did I." Malfoy responded, ignoring his outburst.

Harry was stunned at how calm Draco was. Did he not care at all? Harry knew what the answer was to this question, he was just having a hard time coming to terms with it.

"I must go now. My father is waiting." Draco said. He approached Harry and placed a final goodbye kiss upon his lips. Harry could see that he was struggling not to cry, just like he was. He knew he had to say it now. He had held back before, although he had wanted to say it for a long time. He hoped it would stop Draco from going.

"I…I love you." Harry told him, as he began to break down.

Draco looked at him with fright. "Don't say that." He said. With these last few words, he turned around and left the bathroom, leaving Harry in pieces. 


	10. Chapter 10

Author's Note:

Thanks again for the reviews

Another kind of sad chapter coming up. Well, I'll let you be the judge of that )

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Over the next few days, Harry learnt just how hard he had fallen for Draco. Until now, he had told himself it was just a bit of fun. Although he had had a nagging voice at the back of his mind telling him he was falling in love, he had just tried to push it away. It was not what he wanted to hear and had been sure Draco had not wanted to hear it. The last time Harry could really remember crying was over Sirius' death. Up until now, anyway.

He replayed the last time he had seen Draco in his mind. He could not help but regret telling him what he had. Draco had not even really reacted. Knowing that Draco did not feel the same way truly hurt Harry. He had spent his time moping around since he had left, to the dismay of Ron and Hermione. They had spent the first day pressing him for information, but when it became obvious he was not going to tell them, they gave up and gave him some space.

One thing that he found himself wondering about was whether he would see Draco again. Not that it even mattered. He had made it clear where his loyalties lie, and they were certainly not with Harry. It was not that they had broken up that was affecting Harry so much. Or even that he did not love him. It was that he had joined the other side of the war.

He was aiding Harry's murder.

He quickly tried to chase these thoughts away, finding them too painful to consider. He stood up, deciding he needed to walk. Having no particular destination in mind, he picked up his wand and left the dormitory. As he entered Gryffindor common room, he became extremely paranoid when people stopped talking. He quickened his pace, needing to get out of there as soon as possible. As he exited through the portrait, he was aware of somebody following him.

"Harry!"

Harry turned around to see a flustered Hermione. He waited for her to speak.

"Please tell me what's wrong, Harry. You've hardly spoken to anyone over the past three days." She waited for him to answer.

"Look, Hermione," Harry began, trying to think of an excuse, "I've just been really tired lately, that's all. I've had loads of homework to do and quidditch takes up a lot of my time. I just wanted to rest for a bit."

Hermione relaxed a little bit when he said this. "Are you sure there's nothing else?" She asked him.

"Positive." Harry said, with a reassuring nod.

"Come back inside. It's really cold outside." She told him.

"No, I'm just going to go for a walk. You go back in." He added with a smile.

She hugged him and told him she would see him later. He walked away, feeling guilty for lying to her but knowing he had not really had much other choice. After all, what could he tell her? That he had fallen for Draco Malfoy, their enemy, who had now joined Lord Voldemort. He did not think so.

He was wandering down the corridor in a world of his own, when he collided with Dumbledore, who was walking round a corner.

"I'm so sorry, Professor. I wasn't looking where I was going." Harry quickly said.

"It's quite easily done, Harry. I was just looking for you, actually." He said, with a twinkle in his eye.

"Oh. Really?" Harry was surprised. "What for, Professor?"

"If you would just like to accompany me to my office, we will continue this discussion there." Dumbledore said. He turned around and began to walk in the direction of his office. Harry followed him, wondering what Dumbledore wanted to speak to him about that was obviously private.

When they reached the statue at the bottom of the stairs, Dumbledore muttered the password and they both stepped on the stairs as they began to spiral upwards. Once they reached the office, Dumbledore sat down in his chair behind his desk.

"Please sit down, Harry." Dumbledore requested, as he pointed to the chair.

Harry sat down, feeling uncomfortable. It had been a while since he had been in this office. He looked at Dumbledore expectantly, waiting for him to say something. However, he said nothing. Instead, he studied Harry. Harry felt extremely uncomfortable and decided to say something instead.

"What did you need to see me about, Sir?" He asked.

"I wanted to ask you about Draco Malfoy."

"What about him?" He said, a bit too quickly.

Dumbledore looked at him curiously over the top of his glasses. "Well, as you may know, he has unexpectedly left school. Professor Snape tells me that you two became rather close."

"What?" Harry spluttered.

"I do not wish to know the exact details, as I am sure you would not wish to share them. The reason I have called you here is of a serious nature." Dumbledore paused once more, as if waiting for Harry to react. Harry made a special effort not to give anything away. Dumbledore continued. "The Ministry have found the loaction where Lucius, Draco and other death eaters are hiding. They are now arming themselves so that they can capture them. They will all be immediately handed over to the dementors."

Harry's heart spectacularly sunk. He could not believe this was happening. But then he realised one small fact that could change everything.

"But Draco isn't a death eater!" Harry exclaimed. Dumbledore raised his eyebrows slightly at his use of Draco's first name, but did not comment on it.

"That will not matter, Harry. He is with them and is part of it now."

"Is there nothing we can do?" Harry asked in a pleading way.

"Well perhaps if somebody could get there before the Ministry and persuade him to come away, then not all will be lost."

Harry did not even hesitate before making his next declaration. "I'll do it."

"I think it would be wise if a trained wizard were to confront this situation..." Dumbledore remarked. He was interrupted by Harry.

"…But I'll be more likely to be able to persuade him. Why would he listen to a complete stranger?" Harry cut in eagerly.

There was a long pause while Dumbledore considered this. "It is dangerous." He said in a quiet voice.

"I have faced Voldemort every year so far. I hardly think this is more dangerous." Harry quickly added. He knew that he was beginning to sound reckless but he did not have much time.

"Yes, Harry. But all of these were outside of my control. I cannot just let you enter a situation full of many death eaters who are both fully trained and in league with Lord Voldemort."

"I'll take my invisibility cloak."

"Invisibility cloaks do not offer protection, Harry. In fact, many wizards are trained not to be fooled by them."

Harry knew this was true. Whenever he had been wearing his cloak and had passed Dumbledore, he had always been sure that he knew he was there. He was losing this fight, he knew. Why couldn't Dumbledore see how important this was?

"Please Professor." Harry wondered if he should say the next bit. He thought it may change Dumbledore's thoughts on the situation but he did not know if he wanted to tell him. However, he finally decided that if it determined whether Draco lived or died, it was worth it. "I love him." He did not bring his gaze up to meet Dumbledore's, but focused on the desk.

Harry had expected Dumbledore to remark on the unsuitability of this match, or even comment on the fact that they were both male. However, Dumbledore did no such thing. Instead, he said, "Love makes us do irrational things, Harry"  
Harry was surprised that the older man did not disapprove. He looked up at Dumbledore and saw that he was smiling. He tried again. "Please, Professor." He whispered.

Dumbledore studied him for a few moments, the smile not leaving his face. "Love is the strongest magic," He began.

"Yeah, I know. You've told me before." Harry said. He knew he was being rude, but time was being wasted. He was not prepared to lose another person close to him. If he had known where Draco was, he would have already gone. However, he had to wait for Dumbledore to reveal the location. He was becoming impatient.

"If I do let you go, I need to impress the importance of this upon you."

"I do know it is important. I will be careful. Please. There might not be much time." Harry said quickly.

Dumbledore remained motionless for a few moments as he observed Harry. Harry sat there trying to be patient. Dumbledore finally nodded. "You will need your invisibility cloak. Although it does not offer you full protection, you will find that it will keep you safer than if you did not have it." Upon hearing this, Harry jumped up and dashed out of the office without another word. He ran all the way to the common room, knocking over several first years along the way. When he finally reached the common room, he gave the portrait the password and stumbled through. Everybody looked up when Harry entered. However, he did not stop but ran up to his dormitory to fetch his cloak. Once he had gone upstairs, the people in the common room exchanged worried glances. Harry had looked like he was in quite a rush - falling through the portrait entrance panting. Hermione stood up to go and find him to check that he was ok. As she reached the bottom of the stairs, about to walk up them, Harry pushed past her without saying a word. He ran to the portrait and exited just as abruptly as he had entered.

Harry ran back to Dumbledore's office, not noticing anybody along the way. His mind was too focused on what was going to happen next to worry about whether he pushed past people. Within minutes of leaving, he was back in Dumbledore's office, completely out of breath and grasping his cloak in his left hand.

"Sit down, while I inform you of the details." Dumbledore requested. Harry did as he was told, still panting from his run. "It is important that you do not reveal yourself in front of the death eaters, Harry. They will surely kill you. Do you understand?" Harry noticed that the smile Dumbledore had worn previously had been replaced with a look of serious concern. Harry nodded. Dumbledore continued, "It is unlikely that Draco has been put under any kind of enchantment, but if he is, then you must leave immediately."

Harry did not respond to this command. He was certain he would not be able to leave Draco, under any circumstance.

"Harry. Do you understand?" Dumbledore asked, louder this time. Harry hesitated. "If you cannot agree to that, then I am afraid I cannot permit you to go." Dumbledore said. Harry gave in.

"Ok." Was all he said. He was not happy about it, but he knew he would be stopped from going otherwise. He had regained his breath by now, his vast amount of quidditch practice over the years had caused him to become extremely fit.

"I trust you have your wand?" Dumbledore asked. Harry nodded and pulled it out of his pocket to confirm it. "I will apparate you there."

"I wasn't aware you could apparate anyone else?" Harry asked, sure Dumbledore had got it wrong.

"It is very complicated magic and it is rarely used. In fact, it is not supposed to be used. But you cannot apparate, can you?" Dumbledore explained. Harry shook his head to the last question. "Well, that's settled then." Dumbledore confirmed. "Are you sure about this, Harry? I will not think any less of you if you change your mind." He asked. Harry confirmed this was definitely what he wanted. "Good luck." Was the last thing Dumbledore said before waving his wand and casting a spell that Harry had never heard before.

Harry closed his eyes as he apparated. He did not like this sensation but remembered that he was on his way to save Draco. This thought distracted him from the unpleasant feeling. He did not open his eyes until he had landed on the floor with a thud. Realising he must be there, he opened his eyes and saw that he was in an empty room. He quickly put on his invisibility cloak and a horrible thought came to him. He did not know how he was going to get back to Hogwarts. Panicking briefly, he stood there frozen. But then he decided he would think about that when the problem aroused. He looked round the room. It was very plain. The walls were a cream/yellow colour and the floor was made of stone.

He froze when he heard voices coming from the next room. The door was open, so he stood in the doorway to see what was going on.

"They will not find us here." Someone said. Harry recognised the man as Lucius Malfoy.

"Are you sure? It's not very well hidden, is it?" Harry did not know the person who had said this.

"Shut up. Do you think I would have brought us he if we were not safe, Goyle." Lucius shouted, obviously beginning to get annoyed. "Draco, get me my wand."

Harry's eyes swept round the room, looking for Draco. He finally saw him sitting in the corner. Upon his father's command, Draco quickly stood up and left the room. He returned moments later with Lucius' wand. He then announced he was going to bed and left the room. Harry followed him, knowing he had an opportunity to speak to him alone.

Harry saw which room Draco had walked into and followed moments later. As he swung the door open, Draco turned around abruptly to see who had entered. When he saw no one, he looked frightened. After scanning the room, he cleared his throat.

"Harry?" He whispered.

Harry took off his cloak. "How did you know?" He asked him.

"Doors never used to miraculously open without anyone entering before I met you." Draco remarked. He then came to his senses. "What are you doing here?! My father will kill you if he finds you." He had a high amount of urgency in his voice.

"Draco, the Ministry know where you are all hidden. They are planning an attack as we speak." Harry said.

Harry had expected Draco to be scared. Or perhaps even startled. What he definitely did not expect was for him to not even respond.

"Did you hear me?!" Harry said, a little louder.

"Yes. I heard you."

"You need to come back with me." Harry concluded.

"No. I can't." Draco replied, turning away from him.

"Why not?"

"I have to remain loyal to my father. Please do not ask me to choose."

Harry's patience was wearing thin. "I am not asking you to choose between me and your father. I am asking you to choose between life and death."

"Well, I will have to choose death then. I am not afraid." Draco replied, with no emotion in his voice.

"This is not you." Harry considered vocally.

"Yes, it is! It is me! This is what I've been trying to show you all along. Now you will perhaps listen to me?" Draco shouted, turning around to look at Harry once more.

Harry decided to try another approach. "I meant what I said when you left." He said quietly.

"Please. I told you before, do not say that. It is hard enough for me as it is." Draco said, pleadingly.

"But it doesn't have to be. Come back with me. You will be protected." Harry said, touching Draco's arm. Draco did not pull away this time. He leant into his touch. "I cannot lose you again." Harry said simply. Draco's resistance was weakening. Harry could tell. They were now leaning against each other, their faces only centimetres apart.

"I cannot return. Please leave now. I do not want them to find you here." Draco told him.

"If you won't come back, then I won't go back either." Harry breathed, meaning every word of it.

Draco cupped Harry's face with his hands and kissed him longingly. He broke away after a few moments and looked into his eyes. "Please." He pleaded.

"No." Harry replied. "Only if you come with me."

Their tender moment was broken by the sound of shouting downstairs. Harry suddenly heard curses and spells being cast and immediately knew that the Ministry were there. Draco became desperate.

"Go, Harry! Go now!" He shouted.

As Harry had heard the Ministry break in, he had noticed a book appear on the bed beside them. He realised that it was a portkey that had most likely been put there by Dumbledore. The problem was not that he could not get back, it was that he was not prepared to leave without Draco.

"Not without you!" Harry shouted back.

Draco paused for a moment. "Ok, Harry. I'll come back." He said quietly. Harry felt elated. He kissed him hard, and pulled away just as quickly. Draco seemed saddened, but Harry guessed that it was just because he was reluctant to leave his father.

"There's a portkey there. On my count of three, we'll grab it at the same time, yeah?" Harry spoke quickly, aware that the voices were getting closer. Draco nodded in agreement. Although he looked anything but happy.

"Right. One…Two…" Harry began. Suddenly, he was aware that people were right outside the door. With this, he shouted the last number. "Three!" As he grabbed onto the portkey, there was a brief second before anything happened. In this brief moment, he saw something that sent panic pulsing through him.

Draco did not touch the portkey. 


	11. Chapter 11

Decided to update sooner than I originally intended. Couldn't resist :)

Thank you so much for all the kind reviews I have received so far.

Enjoy:

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The next thing Harry knew, he was sprawled on the floor of Dumbledore's office. Once he had regained his bearings, he looked round to see if he had been wrong. Hoping he had been wrong. To his devastation, he wasn't. Draco had not grabbed on to the portkey. Harry was certain he was dead now. Well, not dead…worse than dead. He suddenly noticed Dumbledore sitting behind his desk and he gave him a look of total despair.

"He said he would come back," Harry began to explain, "He said he would. But he didn't. He didn't hold on to the portkey." Harry realised that his sentences were not complete, but he was in too much shock to care.

"You did what you could." Dumbledore responded softly.

Harry felt anger begin to flare up inside him. "No, I didn't! I should have held on to him!"

"You are not responsible, Harry."

"Yes, I am. I should have known that he didn't want to come with me." He paused, consumed in his own thoughts for a few moments. "Send me back!"

"I'm afraid I cannot do that."

"Why? You sent me there in the first place! Apparate me back!"

"You've done all you can."

"I know. But if he won't come back with me, then I want to go back to him!" Harry shouted. He was beginning to lose his temper now.

"No, Harry." Was the quiet but firm response that Harry received.

Harry knocked one of the lamps over that sat on the small table by the door and watched it as it smashed onto the floor. He was hoping that Dumbledore would send him back in order to keep his possessions safe. However, it did not have the desired effect. Dumbledore remained as calm as ever. In fact, he began to smile.

"Send me back, or…or…I'll smash everything." Harry threatened.

"Go ahead." Was the calm reply that Harry received. "But once you've finished, please sit down again. We need to talk."

Harry knew that he did not believe he would do it. He would have to show him otherwise. He pushed the cloak stand over and watched as it crashed to the floor. He then looked at Dumbledore again, who was still smiling infuriatingly. Figuring that this behaviour was not going to get him sent back to Draco, he decided that perhaps cooperating would be a better option. He sat down on the chair opposite the older man.

"Right, what is it?" Harry said, getting straight to the point.

"What happened back there?" Dumbledore asked him gently.

"I told you. He agreed to come back with me, but then he changed his mind." He paused, wondering whether he should voice his next thought. "He obviously doesn't care about me at all." He shrugged.

"How do you know that?"

"Well, isn't it obvious? Surely if he did care, he would have come back." He said simply.

"Love is a fickle thing, Harry. It's not as straight forward as some people like to think. Love is a strange concept to Draco. He was not brought up with love, but with rules."

"I wasn't brought up with love either. The Dursleys weren't exactly the most loving family." Harry responded. He did not see how that could possibly be used as a reason.

"You knew your parents loved you, Harry. They died to save your life. Draco was never shown excessive love by his parents, in fear that it would make him weak." Dumbledore explained.

"That's rubbish! How can love make someone weak?" Harry asked him.

"It doesn't. It can only make a person stronger. However, the power of love is usually undermined. Just because Draco did not display affection, it does not mean he did not care."

Harry's eyes began to sting. It was almost easier to believe that Draco had had no feelings for him, because he could have at least convinced himself that they had nothing real anyway. That Draco could never love him. The bitterness almost covered the hurt. But knowing that it was a possibility that he had cared just filled Harry with despair. Despair at the fact he had just lost one of the few people who did actually care for him. Just like when he had lost Sirius.

Before he knew it, Harry had begun to cry. He desperately tried to stop himself, feeling humiliated from just sitting there crying, especially in front of Dumbledore. But he found that he could just not help himself. Dumbledore merely watched, fuelling Harry's embarrassment. He hid his face behind his knees, trying to restore some kind of dignity. Once he had composed himself a little better, he put his feet back on the floor.

"Why does it always happen to me? First my parents. Then Sirius. And now, Draco." Harry said. He knew that he sounded sorry for himself, but he could not help it. "Please, let me go back. Perhaps there is still time." He pleaded.

Dumbledore shook his head. "It is too late, Harry."

"No." Harry whispered. "No, it might not be. He might have fought them." As deeply unlikely as that was, Harry needed to cling onto some kind of hope. For his own sanity.

"No, Harry. The Ministry are fully trained and powerful. Draco would stand no chance in a confrontation." Dumbledore replied.

Harry felt sick. He could not accept that that was it.

"Maybe you should go back to your dormitory and get some sleep. You've had quite an ordeal." Dumbledore suggested.

Harry stood up, silently agreeing. With a jump, he heard an extremely loud crack sound from behind him. He spun round automatically. What he saw overjoyed and alarmed him. There was Draco, lying on the floor of Dumbledore's office. However, he was not conscious.

"Harry, go and get Madam Pomfrey." Dumbledore instructed, standing up.

"I want to stay…"

"Go. Now. I am unsure of how serious any injuries of his might be." He said. Harry left the office immediately, worried about the amount of concern he had heard in the older man's voice. He ran to Madam Pomfrey as quick as he could. After he had found her, he explained briefly and waited, impatiently, for her to collect a few potions. Once they had reached Dumbledore's office, Harry ran straight back to Draco's side.

Madam Pomfrey bustled around him for a few minutes before deducing that there was nothing seriously wrong with him, but he had collapsed from exhaustion. She recommended that he be moved straight to the hospital wing so that he could rest.

Ten minutes later, Draco had been placed in a bed on the hospital wing. Harry sat down in a chair next to the bed and looked at Draco's pale face. He wanted to cry as he watched him, knowing how close he had come to losing him. He grasped his pale hand that was lying limply on the bed next to him. He did not know how long he sat there before he was interrupted.

"Harry, I think you need to get some rest." Came Dumbledore's voice.

"Please, I want to stay here. I cannot leave." Harry insisted.

Dumbledore looked at the despair in Harry's face and smiled gently. He nodded. "I'll ask Madam Pomfrey to set you up a bed."

"No, I didn't mean…"

"I would rather you got some rest." Dumbledore persisted. Harry gave in, nodding. 

Madam Pomfrey re-entered the hospital wing to set up a bed for Harry, next to Draco. She bid him goodnight and left. It took Harry ages to get to sleep. He kept tossing and turning, replaying the night's events back through his mind. He wanted to know what had happened once he had left. Wondering what could have possibly caused Draco to come back, he eventually drifted into a restless sleep.

When he woke up, Harry was not immediately sure where he was. He sat up and looked around. Have been there many times before, he recognised the room as the hospital wing. He jumped out of bed and rushed over to Draco's. Seeing he was still asleep, he sunk into the chair next to him and yawned, trying to wake himself up properly. He sat there for at least an hour, studying Draco's face intensely, before the other boy finally woke up.

As Draco opened his eyes, he looked extremely shocked. If the situation had not been so serious, Harry probably would have laughed.

"How are you?" Harry asked, holding his hand firmly.

"Where's my father?" Draco asked in return, sitting up abruptly.

Harry honestly did not know. He had not heard any information regarding Lucius. He told Draco this.

"What happened?" Harry asked him.

"My father saved me. When I was about to be captured, my father used the last of his energy to send me back here. He's…" His voice trailed off. Harry gripped his hand harder. "I thought he didn't care." This was all he could manage to say before his eyes began to water. It was heart-breaking for Harry to watch. But he knew he could not leave him.

"Sssh…" Harry said in a soothing whisper, trying to comfort him.

Draco didn't seem to hear him. He sat in silence, staring at the wall opposite his bed. Harry wanted to know what he was thinking. He wanted to help him but did not know how. Draco began to stand up.

"Where are you going, Drae?" Harry said softly, also standing up.

"I need to get out of here, I need to know what has happened to my father." Came the mechanical reply.

"No, get back into bed. You're not ready to get up yet." Harry said firmly. He stood in front of him so that he had no choice but to sit back down. Draco did as he was told. "How come you were not caught?" Harry asked.

Draco took a few moments to refocus his attention back on Harry. "You left your cloak," He began, "I hid under it once you had gone. I knew that I wouldn't stand a chance if they came in then. So I waited until they had gone back downstairs. I followed them. Once I was back in the room with my father and the others, I removed the cloak," He paused again, still weak, "I tried to help. They grabbed my father, so I threw a hex at the man who bound him. The binding spell broke." He stopped for a minute, trying to compose himself. He carried on quietly. "My father would have had time to get away. But instead, he turned to me and used the opportune moment to get away to send me back to Hogwarts…" His voice trailed off. Harry's eyes were glistening with tears as he listened to Draco's story. He gripped his hands in a comforting way.

"It's ok…it's ok." Harry said, as he rubbed Draco's hand.

"It's not though. I need to know what happened. Does Dumbledore know?" Draco asked him, searching for the answer in his eyes.

"I don't know." He moved from the chair to Draco's bed. They sat side-by-side and Harry put his arm around him. With his free hand, he touched Draco's arm. "Let me look after you."

"I don't need looking after." Draco insisted.

"I know." Harry said. He did not want to give Draco any excuse to start any kind of argument. He knew he must be hurting right now. Draco moved his arm and his sleeve slid up, revealing his cuts. Harry did not say anything. He knew Draco did not like talking about it. "I thought I'd lost you." Harry said quietly. He turned his head and pushed his lips against Draco's neck lovingly. "Please never do anything like that to me again." He whispered, his lips still pushed against Draco's skin.

"I felt so bad for tricking you like that," Draco added, once he had recovered some of his dignity, "I just needed to get you out of there. They might have killed you if you had stayed."

"I don't care." Harry said plainly, still not moving his face away.

"I couldn't bear it if you'd died." Draco explained

"I understand." Harry said, pulling his head away.

"I don't think you do..." Draco stated.

Harry looked at him seriously. "Don't say it. Not unless you mean it."

Draco nodded. "But I do. I've thought about it for a while now."

Harry watched him apprehensively.

"I love you, Harry." 


	12. Chapter 12

Relatively quick update. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far. And if you haven't -- shame on you.

The next, and possibly last, chapter should be up pretty soon.

Enjoy:

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Draco stayed in the hospital wing for the rest of that day and Harry waited loyally with him. They did not talk much but just enjoyed the time sat with each other. When Madam Pomfrey interrupted to say that he could now leave, Harry could not help but feel slightly disappointed. It was not that he wanted Draco to stay there, it was just that he was enjoying spending time with him without the paranoia that somebody might see them. He looked at Draco and saw that he did not seem bothered. In fact, he looked thrilled at being able to leave. Although when Harry thought about it, he could see why. It couldn't have been much fun to sit in a hospital bed all day, being fed numerous potions. Once they had left the hospital wing, Draco turned to Harry.

"I'll see you later, yeah?" Draco said.

"Wha…where are you going?" Harry asked, taken back by the abrupt goodbye.

Draco hesitated before replying. "Dumbledore's office. I want to know where my father is."

"Oh…ok. Do you want me to come?" Harry asked.

"No. You go and get some dinner or something." With this, Draco turned around and walked away. Harry could not help but feel worried. He didn't know how badly Draco would take it if something had happened to Lucius. He was never close to him, like he was his mother, but he seemed to feel guilty that he had got away and Lucius had not. Deciding to act upon Draco's suggestion, he took off in the direction of the Great Hall.

Once he had entered the hall, he quickly scanned Gryffindor table for a sighting of Ron and Hermione. On seeing them, he headed over to join them.

"Harry! Where have you been? We have been so worried!" Hermione exclaimed, standing up and giving him an extremely enthusiastic hug which knocked his glasses sideways. Straightening them, he smiled and greeted his friends. He sat down, and began to load his plate, only just realising how hungry he was. He tried to cobble some kind of story together about where he had been, to which Hermione gave him a sardonic look. She tried to argue with him, but he did not respond. He figured that the more he lied, the more chance there would be of him slipping up and telling them something he wasn't supposed to.

When they had finished eating, they left the hall, Hermione still nagging at him. He gave Ron an exasperated glance, who grinned.

"Look, Hermione. Give it a rest ok?" Ron told her. At this point, Hermione turned her attention from Harry and started to moan at Ron instead. Harry was relieved that she had finally stopped hassling him. Once they had entered the common room, Harry slipped upstairs before Hermione could remember about him. Lying on his bed, he realised it had been just over an hour since he departed with Draco. Possible scenarios of what was happening began to race through his mind. He also dreaded how Draco would react if his father was dead. Harry was pretty sure he would be. After all, he had to face several extremely prepared Aurors. He looked at his marauders map and saw that Draco was still in Dumbledore's office. Deciding he needed to be there in case Draco received bad news, he left the room and left the common room unnoticed.

Harry stood outside Dumbledore's office for at least an hour before Draco finally emerged. When Draco saw him, he did not comment on the fact he was there. It was as if he had expected it. The two boys looked at each other for what seemed like hours before Draco spoke.

"He's dead." Was all he said. Harry immediately felt his heart sink. In any other circumstance, he would have only been too pleased to here that Voldemort's most loyal follower was no longer alive. However, knowing that this information could potentially set Draco back, it was the last thing he had wanted to hear.

"Are you ok?" Harry asked him, his face paling.

Draco nodded.

"It's not your fault, you know." Harry told him, reassuring him before Draco had the chance to question it.

"I know." Draco said quietly. "At first, I felt guilty because I realised that he died to save me. And I had always regarded him as someone who didn't care. So I thought that perhaps it was my fault that we were never close. But then I realised that it wasn't because he didn't care. It was because his number one priority was the Dark Lord." He stated.

"That's right." Harry affirmed.

Suddenly, they heard someone approaching. Harry quickly took his arm off of Draco's, not being able to remember when he had put it on there in the first place. Ron and Hermione appeared. When they saw Harry, they began to walk towards him.

"What do you want, Malfoy?" Ron asked threateningly.

"Oh don't worry, Weasel. I wouldn't ask for anything from you. I know you're too poor to afford anything anyway."

Harry felt helpless. He could not possibly defend Draco because they were supposed to be enemies. But how could he just stand there and watch him be verbally attacked. Also, wouldn't it appear weird to Ron and Hermione if he did not defend them? Not being able to say anything, he merely watched.

"You're pathetic, Malfoy. Just go away." Hermione added.

"Oh, don't worry, I'm going." Draco responded coolly, giving both Ron and Hermione a spiteful look. As he walked away, Harry had an overwhelming urge to follow him.

"What was that about?" He asked them.

"What?" Ron asked, looking genuinely confused.

"He didn't exactly provoke you, did he." Harry said this as more of a statement than a question. He tried not to appear angry, but he wasn't succeeding.

"What's your problem?" Ron asked him. Harry mumbled something about needing to go to the library and left without another word. Ron and Hermione watched him depart, sharing their bemusement. Once he was out of their sight, Harry quickened his pace so that he could find Draco. He eventually ended up running and he caught him up in the corridor.

"Wait!" Harry called after him. Draco slowed down and turned around, looking surprised. "I'm sorry about what happened back there. I told them exactly what I thought about it." He told them.

"But they're your friends." Draco said, looking a bit taken back.

"I don't care." Harry responded, trying to catch his breath.

Draco looked shocked but pleased nevertheless. Harry figured he was probably not used to being put first. Harry pushed Draco up against the wall and looked into his eyes. He could feel Draco's hot breath caressing his face and suddenly wanted to kiss him. However he tried to restrain himself. The moment was so intense but neither boy broke it. As Harry stood there, pressed up to Draco, he could feel himself becoming increasingly aroused. Draco, noticing his arousal, smiled and suggested that they go to the room of requirement. Harry's heart almost skipped a beat when the other boy said that. However, he just smiled and began to lead the way. Once they reached the room of requirements, Harry required a room that he was sure Draco would like. He concentrated as he walked past the entrance three times until a door handle appeared. Draco pushed past him to enter the room and Harry followed.

As the boys entered the room, Draco let out an audible gasp and Harry smiled. After briefly enjoying Draco's reaction, he looked around the room to observe it himself. The walls were a magnificent green colour with a gorgeous cream carpet. The room was much bigger than last time. There was a bed towards the back of the room, with a shiny white bedspread. At the front of the room was a sofa with several cushions. The room had a homely look to it and, although the colours were undeniably Slytherin, Harry was also in awe of the room. He threw himself on the sofa and looked at the portraits.

"Much better than last time." Draco commented.

Harry snorted, stood up and walked up behind him. He wrapped his arms around Draco and kissed the back of his neck gently. Draco squirmed with pleasure and brought his head back slightly. He reached his arm behind him, to touch the top of Harry's head. He then spun around so that they were facing each other.

"I've been waiting too long for this." Was all Harry said before initiating a passionate kiss. As he kissed him, he stroked the side of his face slowly, matching the rhythm of the kiss. Draco leant in to his touch and traced his fingers through his hair. They gradually edged their way over to the bed, Harry leading Draco by the hand. They did not open their eyes once and were only aware that the bed was next to them when they felt it brushing their knees. Harry pushed Draco on the bed and eagerly crawled on top of him.

As they kissed, they undressed each other until they were only wearing their boxers. As they kissed, Harry became more and more aroused, until his penis throbbed painfully. He moaned and gasped as Draco rubbed it gently. As they kissed, Draco brought his body up slightly to rest his own erection against Harry's leg, to show him how aroused he was. This only awakened more desire in Harry and he knew that if something was not done about it soon, he would not last. He had been parted from Draco for a long time now, and he was longing for him.

Harry brought his fingers down to the hem of Draco's boxers without breaking the kiss, to signal that he wanted to take it a step further. At this point, both boys removed their boxers and Harry reached for the container of lubricant that was waiting for them. He applied the amount of lubricant necessary, to both himself and Draco before pushing into the other boy. As Harry thrust in, he felt a shiver run down his spine. He began to thrust in and out, too aroused to set himself at a slow tempo. Draco groaned and writhed in pleasure. With each moan that Draco gave, Harry felt himself thrusting harder. Draco was beginning to shout now, but Harry had too much blood rushing through his head to hear him clearly. He was so overwhelmed by his approaching orgasm that he began to shout as well. He looked down to see that Draco has started to rub his own erect penis, and immediately knocked his hand away, replacing it with his own. Not being able to hear or see anything, he closed his eyes and began to thrust even faster, pumping Draco at the same time. As he came, he couldn't help but shout even louder, although he had no idea of what he was saying. He could also vaguely hear Draco shouting, but he seemed so far away. He also felt a warm liquid slash on his stomach and began to thrust more slowly as his orgasm washed over him

As his orgasm left him, he slumped down on Draco. He was panting heavily and his forehead was clammy from the sweat. Although they had had sex many times during the time that they had had feelings for each other, it had never been as good as that. Harry supposed it was probably because it had been so long since the last time, so they both had a great amount of sexual desire stored within them. Once they had both almost recovered, Draco leant down and kissed Harry's forehead. They laid like this for ages, Harry's head on Draco's chest. Harry began to feel himself fall asleep but did not fight it.

When he woke up, he could feel Draco tracing light circles on his back. Smiling, he brought his gaze up to meet his. Harry felt so comfortable. He asked a question that had been on his mind for a while now.

"Is it always going to be like this?" He asked Draco.

"Like what?" Draco asked, confused.

"Pretending to hate each other before sneaking off to the room of requirement?"

"You agreed that this would be best. You didn't want anyone to know, either." Draco reminded him. "What about the newspapers? They would be all over the place."

"I don't care about that." Harry stated firmly. "All I care about…is you. What's stopping us? Your father can't stop us." Harry told him, trying not to appear insensitive. "Do you love me?"

"I told you I do." Draco said quietly.

"So what's the problem then?" Harry asked.

"How would we tell people? Everyone in Gryffindor hates me, and I can assure you that you are no favourite amongst the Slytherins." Draco told him.

"I know. But I don't want to hide it anymore. Are you ashamed of me?" Harry asked.

"Who said anything about shame?" Draco looked shocked at Harry's question. "It's just that I have a place in Slytherin. If I'm with you, I lose my place. It's not like in Gryffindor where everyone is friends with everybody else. In Slytherin, your friends are based on power."

"Well, they don't sound like friends to me." Harry stated.

Draco shrugged. "You get used to it. It's just the way it is."

"A Slytherin isn't who you are." Harry told him. "It shouldn't control your life."

Draco was silent as he thought about this. After a substantial length of silence he spoke again.

"Ok, we'll do it."

Harry brought his head up and shifted himself upwards so that he met Draco's face. He realised, however, that Draco was not as thrilled as he was. He kissed him hard.

"It'll be ok. I promise." 


	13. Chapter 13

Last chapter. Have really enjoyed writing it and would just like to say a big thank you to everyone who has ever read and reviewed.

Enjoy!

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The two boys stayed in the room of requirements for the rest of the night, not being able to depart from each other and wanting to delay the process of telling everybody. Draco was the first to wake up and proceeded to wake Harry with a tender kiss on his forehead. Harry's eyes opened and he looked up at Draco and smiled. They lay there for an extra few minutes, not wanting to face the real world again. However, Harry soon decided to get out of bed and Draco watched him as he got dressed.

"Don't just lay there. Get up." Harry said, as he threw Draco's trousers at him. Draco sighed but did as he was told. Within fifteen minutes, they were both dressed and ready to depart their idealistic, fantasy world. Harry pulled Draco into a deep kiss.

"Come on. Lets show everyone we aren't afraid." He said, when he pulled away from the kiss. Draco nodded.

They left the room and Draco watched Harry for guidance. Harry seemed to be behaving as they would have done if they had been continuing to keep it a secret. He told Harry this.

"I want to tell Ron and Hermione first. I don't want them to hear from someone else." He whispered urgently. He then quickened his pace to escape Draco's company. Draco felt hurt. So Harry wanted to announce it to everyone, but only on his terms? His hurt quickly turned to anger. Here he was, about to ruin every scrap of reputation that he had left for someone who couldn't even put him first for once. Why did it matter if that weasel and mudblood didn't find out immediately? They weren't even directly involved! Draco stalked off back to Slytherin common room, with these angry thoughts racing through his mind. He wasn't going to let Potter get away with this.

When Harry entered Gryffindor common room, he received many strange looks. Some of the girls from the year below even looked hurt. He searched the sea of faces for Ron and Hermione. When he saw them, he joined them quickly. They looked at each other uncertainly. Harry was the first to speak.

"What's wrong with everyone?" He whispered. "Why is everyone looking at me?" Harry was used to being looked at, but it was usually after something big had happened.

"You weren't in your room last night. Word got round pretty quickly." Hermione explained.

"Can we talk somewhere more private?" Harry asked them. With that, all three of them stood up and went upstairs to the dormitory. Seeing that it was empty, they entered the room.

"So where were you then?" Hermione asked, with a hint of a grin on her face. "Who's the lucky girl?"

Harry hesitated. He wasn't sure how he should phrase this. "I wasn't with a girl."

Hermione's smile left her face. "Oh, sorry. I just assumed that you were probably with someone seeing as you didn't come back. Did something happen?" She looked concerned.

"I told her…told her you wouldn't be with someone else. I mean, you only left Ginny because you didn't want her to get hurt. You love her…" Harry cut him off.

"Ron. Don't, ok? I do care about Ginny, I genuinely do. But I wasn't entirely honest about why I broke up with her." Harry told him, not wanting to look at him.

"Oh. Well what was it then?" He asked him. He sounded slightly annoyed.

"There was something missing. I never knew what it was, but I knew it was unfair on her to pretend. She deserves to be with someone who can make her happy." He explained. He decided that honesty was the best policy for what he was about to tell them. Otherwise, the cracks in his story would show.

Hermione was the next to speak as Ron fell into a stunned silence. "Harry, you know you can tell us, right? You should have told us about Ginny."

"I know, but I couldn't explain it. I didn't even know myself. Also, Ginny is Ron's sister. I didn't want us to fall out over it." Harry told her.

"You're my best mate. Ginny isn't a baby anymore." Ron mumbled.

"What is it, Harry? Was there a problem last night? Did it have anything to do with…" She hesitated. "…Voldemort?" She flinched as she said his name.

Harry suddenly realised why she seemed so worried. She thought he had been in danger. "No, Hermione. It had nothing to do with Voldemort. But I do have something to tell you"  
Ron and Hermione just waited, looking at him impatiently.

"I was with someone last night." Harry said slowly.

"But you just said…" Ron began.

"No, I said I wasn't with a girl."

"I don't…"

"I was with Malfoy." Harry said determinedly, looking up at them for the first time. They both looked confused. Ron suddenly laughed.

"Haha that made it sound like you're a couple or something. We didn't mean 'with' as in just 'being with' someone, like you're with us now." Ron told him, still laughing.

"No, neither did I." Harry said quietly.

Ron shut up extremely quickly. The room was completely silent. The atmosphere was unbearably thick as somebody tried to think of something to say.

"Harry, are you sure this is a good idea? I mean, his parents are both in league with Voldemort…" Hermione began.

"His parents are dead." Harry said, flatly.

"Oh." Hermione looked embarrassed. "Well, how do you know Malfoy isn't?"

"In league with Voldemort?" Harry asked her. Hermione nodded. "I feel like I know him. He's not a bad person."

Ron scoffed. Harry looked at him darkly. "This is the boy who has been treating you…treating us like shit for the last 6 years." Ron told him.

"It wasn't like it was completely unprovoked. What about the other day when you walked up to him, with no reason whatsoever, and just started picking a fight? He just walked away." Harry argued, defending Draco.

"He deserved it." Ron shouted back.

"No, he didn't. He had just found out his father had died. Nobody deserves that!" Harry yelled back, his anger getting the better of him.

Hermione quickly intervened. "How long?" She asked, trying to steer the conversation in a positive direction.

"Two months." Harry replied. "Since Christmas."

Ron and Hermione's jaws dropped. They had expected it to be a matter of weeks or days. Not months.

"So that's why you've been moping around." Hermione said. Harry nodded. "Well, if you're sure about Malfoy, then we'll try to accept it." Ron began to protest but quickly shut up when Hermione gave him an evil look.

Harry smiled gratefully. "Thanks. It means a lot to me."

Harry spent the next few hours studying his marauders map, waiting for Draco to leave his common room. He wanted to talk to him but the blonde didn't seem to have any intention in leaving. Harry was growing impatient. He didn't even have his invisibility cloak anymore, so he couldn't even just sneak in there. After what seemed like days, Draco finally left with Parkinson and Zabini in tow. He jumped up from his bed and dashed off to meet them.

When he finally found them, Pansy looked at him scornfully. Harry stood there, waiting for Draco to say something, but it never came.

"What are you looking at, Potter?" Parkinson sneered.

"I want to talk to Draco." He replied.

"Draco?" Zabini scorned, looking surprised. " Since when has it been 'Draco'? Well, he doesn't want to talk to you."

"I think he can speak for himself." Harry replied coldly. It was becoming clear that Draco had not told them.

"I don't want to talk to you." Draco drawled. His eyes displayed no warmth or kindness. Harry felt a twinge of hurt. "Out of our way, Potter." Was all that Draco said before they carried on walking, shoving Harry as they passed him.

Harry was hurt, upset and confused. But Draco obviously did not know him very well if he thought he could just dump him like that, with not so much as a word. If he wanted to dump him, then fine. But he couldn't do it without explaining first. Well, it wasn't fine, but Draco could at least have the decency to explain. Harry chased after him.

"Malfoy!" He shouted. Draco turned around, with a sneer plastered across his face. "You can't do this. I want to talk to you. Now." Harry told him, fury replacing his original feelings of hurt.

Draco rolled his eyes. "Fine." He told Parkinson and Zabini that he would catch up with them later, and followed Harry into an empty classroom.

"What do you want, Potter?" Draco asked him, with a bored expression across his face.

"What's happened? I don't understand." Harry asked him, not really sure of what to specifically ask.

"I'm sick of playing by your rules. Everything is always your choice. And whenever I submit, there's always a condition or another rule."

"What are you on about?"

"I'm on about what happened earlier. I didn't want to tell people about us or make it common knowledge, but you finally talked me into it. I still wasn't sure, but I knew I had to do it to keep you. And then, as soon as I had agreed, you changed the rules yet again, and decided we couldn't tell anyone until you had told your friends." Draco shouted, refraining from referring to Ron and Hermione as 'Weasel and the mudblood'.

Harry was stunned into silence. He had not realised it was such a big deal. He voiced this opinion.

"A big deal? A big fucking deal? Of course it is." Draco bellowed, jumping up and flinging his arms into the air. "Everything I've done for you is a big fucking deal. All you did was prove one thing to me. That I am obviously not worth your time."

Harry was confused. "You are though. Do you think I would have wanted to tell people if you hadn't?"

Draco looked momentarily speechless. After a pause, he continued. "Well, if I was, then why did you have to put them first? All my life, I've been shoved to the back of the queue. I thought you were different." He said quietly.

Seeing that his anger was subsiding, Harry took it as his cue to speak again. "Look, Draco. I wasn't putting them first. I just wanted them to know before everyone else did. I thought you would have wanted to tell your friends too."

"So what would you have done if they had not accepted it? Left me?" Draco asked him.

"No. They would have had to deal with it." Harry told him earnestly. "Listen to me, Draco. I love you. And don't doubt that." Harry told him as he closed the gap between them and pulled him into an embrace.

"I thought I'd lost you." Draco whispered.

Harry laughed gently. "You're not going to get rid of me that easily." After a few moments, he spoke again. "Are you going to tell your friends?"

Draco shook his head. Harry felt disheartened. "I want to show them." Draco added. Harry smiled, hugging him tighter.

Twenty minutes later, Harry and Draco entered the Great Hall. As they walked side-by-side, people began to whisper. It was common knowledge that Potter and Malfoy hated each other. It seemed strange that they were not arguing. It was what happened next that really created gossip. The two boys looked at each other, smiled and then locked hands. Once they were about halfway down the hall, they let go of each others' hands and departed to sit at their own tables. The crowd that surrounded Harry was horrendous. Everybody was eager to know what had happened and why they no longer seemed to hate each other. Harry ignored them and began to eat. He looked over at where Draco was at Slytherin table. A few people were obviously insulting him. Harry could not hear what they were saying, but could tell they were not kind words from their body language. Harry stood up to intervene but Hermione stopped him.

"Just leave it for a bit. It'll be better for him if he can sort it out himself." She told him. He sat down once more but did not take his eyes off the Slytherin's table. He saw Draco say something in a calm matter and everyone immediately went quiet. Harry wanted to hear what he had said, but could not hear from where he was sitting.

As Harry continued to eat his dinner, feeling much more relaxed, he began to think about his situation. A few months ago, if somebody had told him that he was about to see a whole new side to Draco Malfoy that he would grow to like, he would have never believed them. After all, he was the boy he had fought with for years and it never seemed like it was something they would ever be able to overcome. He never considered that Draco's bitterness and coldness was a result of jealously and inner pain. He had always believed it was because he was a stuck-up snob, who had always believed he was better than anybody else. Underneath that cold exterior that Harry had grown to know so well was an insecure and hurting person, who he was completely in love with.

With a smile, Harry realised that nothing is what it seems. 


End file.
